Many today feel that attention spans are becoming shorter due to the prevalence of social media. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

The

use

of social

media

has been the subject of increasing debate and controversy, particularly with regard to its alleged negative impact on individuals'

attention

spans.

While

some argue that social

media

is to blame for

this

phenomenon, I strongly disagree with

this

belief, for two main reasons.

Firstly

, the side effects of technology

use

, rather than social

media

itself, could be responsible for

attention

issues.

Secondly

, the primary factor contributing to shorter

attention

spans is related to a sedentary

lifestyle

. I disagree with the argument that social

media

use

is the primary cause of short

attention

spans because using electronic devices

such

as smartphones and laptops could be the real culprit. The blue light emitted by these devices has been shown to have adverse effects on cognitive function,

according to

a recent article published by The University of Tokyo.

This

can lead to a decreased ability to concentrate, which may be mistakenly attributed to social

media

or other applications.

As a result

, some people argue that social

media

is harmful to the brain.

Furthermore

, there is ample evidence that a modern sedentary

lifestyle

is the root cause of shorter

attention

spans. Various medical institutions have demonstrated that sitting in front of a desk for extended periods has a negative impact on cognitive function, including memory and concentration.

This

lifestyle

also

linked to chronic diseases

such

as obesity and diabetes, which can indirectly affect

attention

span.

Therefore

it is clear that

social

media

is not the underlying problem contributing to

attention

issues. In conclusion, I firmly believe that the side effects of electronic devices and the sedentary

lifestyle

are more problematic than social

media

use

. It is essential to identify the underlying issues that cause shorter

attention

spans before engaging in debates on

this

topic. By understanding the root causes, we can develop effective strategies to mitigate the negative impact of technology and

lifestyle

on cognitive function.

Submitted by ryohei.1015.golf on Tue Apr 25 2023

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task response

Well done! Your essay effectively addresses the given prompt and provides a comprehensive response.

coherence and cohesion

You have demonstrated a strong logical structure throughout the essay, making it easy for the reader to follow your arguments and examples. Ensure that your introduction and conclusion are more explicitly tied to the rest of the essay.

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11Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

318 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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The idea of going overseas for university study is an exciting prospect for many people. But while it may offer some advantages, it is probably better to stay home beause of the difficulties a student inevitably encounters living and studying in different culture.

The gap between rich and poor is growing. What problems does this create? What can be done to tackle this.

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Investor are not as important to society as doctors. To what extent do yo agree with this statement? Give reason and include any relevant example based on your own knowlegde.

In some countries fast food restaurants and supermakets give money to schools to promote their products. do you think this is a positive or negative development ?