The pie chart shows the main reason why agricultural land becomes less productive.

#reason #land

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The pie chart illustrates the reasons for land being less

cultivative

Correct your spelling

cultivated

cultivation

for agricultural purposes . Meanwhile, the table shows how these affected the three different regions in the year 1990.

Overall

Linking Words

, it is clear from the chart that,the over-grazing is the main reason for soil degradation. At the same time, the data makes it clear that Europe is the most pompous of it.

Firstly

Linking Words

, over-grazing

account

Wrong verb form

accounted

show examples

for 35% in 1990 followed by deforestation with no less than 30%.

However

Linking Words

, it is normal to cut down trees.

Although

Linking Words

, it is mandatory to plant another

instead

Linking Words

that is

Linking Words

absent in

this

Linking Words

data. The next reason is over-cultivation which is only 2% less than deforestation and the others are about 7%.

Secondly

Linking Words

, Europe is the region with the highest percentage 23 and Oceania with 13%.

Moreover

Linking Words

, North America is the one with the least ratio.

However

Linking Words

, Europe has an

overall

Linking Words

majority .Oceania accounts for 0% of over-cultivation.

Submitted by ameeshaaa19 on Mon Jun 12 2023

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "however, overall".

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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.

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Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 2 times.

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Vocabulary: The word "data" was used 2 times.

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9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

153 words

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The pie chart shows the main reason why agricultural land becomes less productive.

Holding International games such as The Olympic Games is an exciting event. Some people think that it has positive effects while other argue that it is a waste of money. Dicuss both sides of view and give your own opinion.

It is believed that secondary school children should study international news as one of their school subjects. Others think that this is a waste of valuable school time. Discuss both views and give your opinions.

There seems to be an increasing number of serious crimes commited each year. While some think the best way is to use the death penalty as a detterent, many people believe that other measures will be needed.