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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

The two maps illustrate the external and internal changes in the design of a health centre that happened from 2005 until the present day

The two maps illustrate the external and internal changes in the design of a health centre that happened from 2005 until the present day
These layouts illustrate the indoor and outdoor changes in the decor of health care that builds from 2005 until now.
Overall
Linking Words
,
due to
Linking Words
 the
last
Linking Words
 plan,
this
Linking Words
 clinic had five parts ,
while
Linking Words
 it convert to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
seven parts now.
Also
Linking Words
, there is a change in the
entrance
Use synonyms
 location .
According to
Linking Words
this
Linking Words
 information, the minor operations room is built
instead
Linking Words
 of the garden in the north of the plan.
Additionally
Linking Words
, the number of CR rooms
were
Correct subject-verb agreement
was
show examples
 three which rise to four rooms in 2023.
Moreover
Linking Words
, the capacity of car parking was roughly 12 spaces that It is added to 30 spaces in 2023.
It is clear that
Linking Words
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 the location of the
entrance
Use synonyms
 was at the bottom of
layout
Add an article
the layout
show examples
 and the reception in front of that. There are changes in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
2023 so that,the
entrance
Use synonyms
 is
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
 the left side of the plan with
children's
Correct article usage
the children's
show examples
 play area and reception desk after the
entrance
Use synonyms
.

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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words entrance with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "illustrate" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "changes" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Only 6 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: The word "changes" was used 3 times.
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