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Writing Samples
Band 8

People aim to achieve a balance between their work and lives, but few people achieve it. what are the couses of this problem? How to overcome it?

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As time goes on, jobs and professions are getting more and more demanding because of the increasing population,
hence
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, making humans have to compete with each other. Nowadays, people have a goal to balance the proportion between their work and lives,
however
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, only a few people are able to do it.
This
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 writing will give some information about the causes and suggest several pieces of solutions to solve it. There are some global problems that have influenced and generated an imbalance between working and having some fun. To start with, the staggering number of workers who are willing to apply for the same expertise is concerning.
This
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 phenomenon leads to
an
Correct article usage
apply

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

show examples
unhealthy competition which has to be gone through to get the job.
For example
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, the world has changed into a fast-paced place that requires its population to adapt to it,
therefore
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, making some people who can not catch up rejected. In short, some hard times are created by the towering amount of living beings and the evolution of civilization that causes one's life to be faster. As highly adaptive creatures, human beings are capable of creating a lot of solutions for these problems.
For instance
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

,
first,
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

ones ought to work or do something more efficiently,
thus
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 generating more progress than others and reaching a higher level in the battle.
Second,
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

choosing a job which can be enjoyed is a very effective way to tackle boredom,
hence
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, producing a better final product and gaining more time to spend on vacations or holidays with beloved ones.
To conclude
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, there are some solutions to balance between professions and vacations,
such
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 as finding a way to do a job more effectively and picking an occupation which is preferred. In conclusion, there are some pupils who have a hard time choosing what is more important, their source of income or happy life. But, no need to be afraid, there are different ways to stabilize it by innovating a shorter method to get a much better result in one's expertise and picking an occupation that does not gain any stress.

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