The diagram below shows the process of producing smoked fish.

The diagram below shows the process of producing smoked fish.
The given
process
chart gives
the
Correct article usage
a
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detailed idea of making smoked
fish
. As we can clearly
seen
Change the verb form
see
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that
Correct determiner usage
the
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process
of making smoked
fish
is almost 12
steps
Correct your spelling
12-step
procedure which starts at catching
fish
and ends with selling in
fish
Add an article
a fish
the fish
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shop.
To begin
with, catching the
fish
and
transport
Wrong verb form
transporting
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it to the port via boat.
Then
Correct your spelling
The
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process
of freezing the
fish
occurs. Afterwards
fish
have to be
thaw
Wrong verb form
thawed
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in fresh water.
Next,
cutting of
fish
happens in which we cut the
fish
and
distiled
Correct your spelling
distilled
in sal water until
water
Correct article usage
the water
show examples
turn
Change the verb form
turns
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into
Change preposition
apply
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yellow colour. Following that,
fish
goes into
smoke
Add an article
the smoke
a smoke
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pot and
smoking
Correct article usage
the smoking
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of
fish
would be done.
This
step is the most important for
whole
Add an article
the whole
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procedure.
And after
Correct word choice
After
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that, smoked
fish
will be packed in
box
Add an article
a box
the box
show examples
and
have to
Verb problem
apply
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stored
them
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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in freezer and put the boxes in cold storage. The
last
step of the
process
is
transport
Fix the infinitive
to transport
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it and distribute it to the
fish
shop for selling
purpose
Fix the agreement mistake
purposes
show examples
.
To conclude
, making smoked
fish
is
lengthy
Add an article
a lengthy
show examples
process
from
fish
catching to
sell
Wrong verb form
selling
show examples
. But the most important part of the whole making
process
is smoking
fish
.
Submitted by bhumikashah1414 on

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Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
Vocabulary: Replace the words process, fish with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
Vocabulary: Only 3 basic words for charts were used.
Vocabulary: The word "give" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
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