IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6

“Public libraries should only provide books and should not waste their limited resources on expensive high-tech media such as software, videos or DVDs. Do you agree or disagree?”

#“public #libraries #books #waste #resources #media #software #videos #dvds
n
Correct your spelling
In
this
 modern era, the usefulness of public
libraries
 may be weakened by the wide availability of online
resources
.
Hence
, some may suggest that the government should spend less expenditure on advanced media and only provide books. In my belief,
libraries
 still hold a firm stance in society. Undoubtedly,
libraries
 should keep providing a large variety of
resources
 by equipping high-tech facilities. First and foremost, it is a public place which allows the community to have access to different
resources
such
 as journal articles and tutorial videos. In order to benefit the public as a whole, it should not be restricted to offering
book borrowing
Add a hyphen
book-borrowing
show examples
 services only.
Moreover
, some low-income families highly rely on the technology equipment in
libraries
.
For example
, if they do not have any electronic devices, which may be unaffordable to them, at home, they usually make use of computers or
Ipads
Correct your spelling
iPads
show examples
 there to complete their assignments.
Furthermore
, it
also
 profoundly contributes to media history and facilitates cultural heritage because it contains a lot of historic and valuable documents and DVDs. Despite the usefulness of public
libraries
, it is unarguable that they are losing popularity in society. With the rapid developments on the Internet, people are more likely to do research online,
instead
 of in
libraries
 so they gradually give lukewarm reviews on them. Apart from
it
Correct pronoun usage
that
show examples
,
those
Correct determiner usage
apply
show examples
resources
 like magazines and journal articles, which were originally limited to public facilities only, can now be easily read via several media.
For instance
, the University of Queensland
also
 has an online library for students to read books or reports digitally.
Therefore
, people may doubt the necessity of
libraries
.
To sum up
, it is undeniable that public
libraries
 may not be as widely used as before,
I
Correct word choice
but I
show examples
still think that it greatly benefits the community, especially minorities, by offering advanced technical support to them.
Submitted by ngthao1127 on

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task response
Make sure to fully address the prompt and provide a clear stance on the issue.
coherence cohesion
Organize your ideas in a logical flow and use cohesive devices to connect your paragraphs.
lexical resource
Diversify your vocabulary and use more complex words and phrases to enhance your writing.
grammatical range
Work on improving your sentence structure and grammar to avoid errors and improve clarity.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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