During the last century, the phenomenal popularity of cars has meant that the world’s environment is now at risk. Some scientists, for example, claim that motor vehicles have been responsible for the temperature of the world rising by several degrees during the last few decades. What motivate people to buy cars and what can we do to stop people from buying them?

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The
car
has been one of the favourite means of transportation for commuting
people
from place to place during the
last
century. Some experts argue that the effects of using the
car
have caused the world temperature to rise by several degrees in recent years.
Therefore
,
this
essay outlines the reasons why
people
still choose to buy
cars
and provides possible solutions to stop
people
from purchasing them.
To begin
, the most obvious motivation
people
choose to purchase
cars
is their convenience. To be specific,
cars
are far more convenient than public
transport
when travelling outside the city.
For instance
, to travel to some remote areas, driving a
car
would be faster than a train and it is
also
straightforward to access some local areas if drivers want to make a stop.
In addition
, a
car
also
makes it easier for parents to travel with young children.
This
is because
cars
remove the worry and hassle of walking with children to public
transport
or changing between different modes of
transport
.
Nonetheless
,
although
buying a
car
ensures
people
’s convenience, the effects of global warming or climate
changes
Fix the agreement mistake
change
show examples
due to
car
usage are foreseen.
Thus
, to encourage
people
to stop purchasing a
car
, expanding more reliable public
transport
would be plausible.
This
means that the destination is far more accessible.
For example
, the train and bus network system in Japan is
well expanded
Add a hyphen
well-expanded
show examples
throughout the city and the countryside.
Furthermore
, existing
transport
systems could be made cheaper, more frequent, and more accessible. With these improvements,
people
would be more inclined to use public
transport
, rather than own a
car
. In conclusion, it is true that
cars
are popular because of their convenience. At the same time, in order to reduce the amount of
cars
that may damage the environment, the government must pay attention to developing more reliable public
transport
so that citizens can be encouraged to use alternative
transport
that is
less
damage
Replace the word
damaging
show examples
to the environment.
Submitted by vithearin.chorn on

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supported main points
The essay logically presents the case for the popularity of cars and provides some solutions for reducing their usage, but it could benefit from more specific and varied examples to support the main points.
logical structure
Ensure that each paragraph has a clear main idea and that ideas are not repeated unnecessarily. Use linking words to show contrast, cause and effect, or to add information, and ensure that different points are connected in a logical manner.
introduction conclusion present
Your essay introduction and conclusion are present and relevant to the task. However, consider improving the strength of your thesis statement in your introduction and making a more definitive statement in your conclusion for higher impact.
clear comprehensive ideas
You have addressed the task in a relevant way and developed your response to cover the main points of the question. To further enhance your task achievement score, elaborate more on the solutions by giving more detailed examples and analyze their potential effectiveness.
complete response
Make sure that the response explicitly addresses all parts of the task. Both the reasons for car popularity and possible solutions need to be fully developed, with multiple perspectives included for a comprehensive treatment of the issue.
relevant specific examples
Incorporate a wider range of specific examples that can demonstrate your point more effectively. The examples should be clearly linked to the claims you make, and where possible, show a global perspective.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • motor vehicles
  • environmental impact
  • global warming
  • status symbol
  • personal achievement
  • consumer behavior
  • transport infrastructure
  • emissions
  • mass transit
  • urban planning
  • carpooling
  • public awareness
  • incentives and disincentives
  • sustainable alternatives
  • carbon footprint
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