Nowadays animal experiments are widely used to develop new medicines and to test the safety of other products. Some people argue that these experiments should be banned because it is morally wrong to cause animals to suffer, while others are in favour of them because of their benefits to humanity. Discuss both views and give your own opinion
It is true that new medicines and products are widely tested on
animals
prior to commercial release. Although
I agree that animal experiments for medicine testings
are advantageous to humans, Fix the agreement mistake
testing
animal
could suffer from trauma to their bodies.
There are two main reasons to explain why these Fix the agreement mistake
animals
experimentations
are beneficial for people. Replace the word
experiments
Firstly
, mammals such
as mice, monkeys
offer DNAs that are biologically similar to human beings. Correct word choice
and monkeys
Therefore
, scientists can study whether treatments are effective or not before mass production. Secondly
, the
animal research is highly regulated by governments in certain regions, with laws in place to protect patients from mistreatment. By doing so, it could alleviate the risks of serious flaws in research results and wasting the lives of the animal subjects.
Correct article usage
apply
However
, some opponents argue that the
animal testing Correct article usage
apply
consider
Change the verb form
considers
an
unethical Correct article usage
apply
behavior
because these Change the spelling
behaviour
animals
might suffer from extreme pains
and be killed in the Fix the agreement mistake
pain
labratory
. From my perspective, Correct your spelling
laboratory
animals
should have Correct article usage
the rights
rights
to live as humans, Fix the agreement mistake
right
hence
, there are some alternative testing methods now
exist that can replace the need for Correct pronoun usage
that now
animals
. For examples
, researchers developed the testing on human cells or tissue in a petri dish. Fix the agreement mistake
example
Consequently
, not only does the new medical methodology provide with us more accurate outcomes, but it also
saves more lives of animals
.
In conclusion, it seems to me that it would be restricted to animal testings
. Fix the agreement mistake
testing
In addition
, governments and organizations should apply other moral methods on
clinical trials.Change preposition
to
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task achievement
The essay addresses both views of the argument, but fails to develop a strong personal stance. To improve, ensure that your own opinion is expressed more explicitly and integrated thoroughly throughout the essay. This can often be achieved by stating your opinion clearly in the introduction and then referencing back to it in each paragraph as you present different arguments.
coherence cohesion
The essay demonstrates some organization and paragraphing, which helps in following the line of argument. However, the logical progression of ideas could be strengthened by using a wider range of cohesive devices and transitioning phrases to link paragraphs and sentences more effectively. Practice using words and phrases like 'furthermore', 'in contrast', 'this suggests that', etc., to provide clearer connections between your ideas.
Word Count
IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.
A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.
Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.