The chart below shows the value of one country's exports in various categorries during 2015 and 2016.

#value #country #exports #categorries

The bar chart illustrates the amount of several

export

commodities in a country between 2015 and 2016.

Overall

, the

export

values in all categories increased in 2016 compared to 2015 except for gems and

jewellry

Correct your spelling

jewellery

which declined slightly in 2016. The petroleum products

export

amount went up approximately 2

billion

dollars

in 2016 to 63

billion

dollars

after their

last

trade in 2015 which is 61

billion

dollars

. The enginereed products transaction value started at 57

billion

dollars

in 2015,

then

, it surged to 62

billions

Change to singular

billion

show examples

in 2016. The textile commodity trade amount

also

increased significantly in 2016 and reached 32

billion

dollars

compared to its prior year value

that

Correct pronoun usage

which

show examples

marks only 25

billion

dollars

. The agriculture products category increased a little bit around 1

billion

dollars

in 2016.

On the other hand

, gems and jewellery commodity value in

export

dropped from 43

billion

dollars

in 2015 to 41

billion

dollars

in 2016.

Submitted by hilmi.santiago.alif on Sun Dec 31 2023

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.

▼

Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.

▼

Vocabulary: Replace the words export, billion, dollars with synonyms.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "compared" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 3 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 3 times.

▼

Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.

▼

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5Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Grammar mistakes
 

3 paragraphs

153 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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The chart below shows the value of one country's exports in various categorries during 2015 and 2016.

Today, more and more people want things instantly (e.g: goods, service, news). Why is this? Is it a positive or negatibe development?

ou are looking for a part-time job. Write a letter to an employment agency. In your letter: - introduce yourself - explain what sort of job you would like - say what experience and skills you have

Learning English at school is often seen as more important than learning local languages.If these are not taught, many are at risk of dying out. In your opinion, is it important for everyone to learn English? Should we try to ensure the survival of local languages and if so, how?

Some people think the main purpose of school is to turn children into good citizens and workers, rather than to benefit them as individuals. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

ou are looking for a part-time job. Write a letter to an employment agency. In your letter: - introduce yourself  - explain what sort of job you would like  - say what experience and skills you have