Q. Air pollution is currently a big issue in most industrialized cities causing respiratory problems and changes in weather patterns. What do you think are the causes of this? What measures can be taken to reduce air pollution?

#q #air #pollution #cities #changes #weather #patterns #measures

It is observed that

air

pollution

is currently a major issue in most

industialized

Correct your spelling

industrialized

industrialised

cities causing respiratory problems like asthma and lung cancer,

moreover

Add a comma

moreover,

show examples

it disturbs the climate patterns

Change preposition

apply

show examples

sometimes more cooler and warmer than normal.

Air

pollution

is specifically causes

Change the verb form

is specifically caused

is specifically causing

show examples

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

When chemical gases

uses

Wrong verb form

used

show examples

in the industries

excreted

Add a missing verb

are excreted

show examples

in the

air

Meanwhile

Add a comma

Meanwhile,

show examples

air

involves the

hazard

Replace the word

hazardous

show examples

components. When individuals in

the

Correct article usage

show examples

specific polluted

area

takes

Change the verb form

take

show examples

breath their lungs

got

Wrong verb form

get

show examples

effected

Correct your spelling

affected

show examples

, and with the passage of

time

Add a comma

time,

show examples

it causes lungs

desease

Correct your spelling

disease

and

then

death.

According to

a survey of WHO (

world health organization

Correct your spelling

World Health Organization

show examples

) stated that globally,

air

pollution

is responsible for about 7 million premature deaths per year from lung cancer. The most suitable solution for

this

problem is to build factories far from the populated

area

Fix the agreement mistake

areas

show examples

and manage the release of gases in an acceptable way.

Consequently

, the weather will not be polluted and the public will take

breath

Add an article

a breath

show examples

in the fresh

air

Moreover

Add a comma

Moreover,

show examples

government should start an expedition to

plan

Correct your spelling

plant

show examples

trees and make their environment green, so they can keep their atmosphere out of

pollution

. In conclusion,

Air

pollution

is caused by industries in the public

area

and

affect

Correct subject-verb agreement

affects

show examples

human life. It can be solved by building industries outside of the main city

area

Submitted by jhonyxxx579 on Mon Jan 22 2024

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement

The essay partially addresses the task. While it touches upon causes and measures, it lacks detail and development of ideas. Consider expanding on each point with more examples and explanations.

coherence cohesion

The essay has a logical structure, but the flow of ideas can be improved. Use a range of cohesive devices and topic sentences to guide the reader through your argument more clearly.

coherence cohesion

Your introduction and conclusion are present, but they could be stronger. Make your thesis statement more explicit in the introduction and summarize your main points more effectively in the conclusion.

task achievement

Support your main points with specific, relevant examples. Quantitative data, case studies, or comparisons can enhance the quality of your arguments and demonstrate a deeper understanding of the topic.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

5Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
21Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

207 words

<40

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 checks
Get all the feedback you need to keep improving your charts and letters.
Unlimited Task 2 checks
Practice and perfect your skills with essays.
Personalized suggestions
Know how to boost your score.
Detailed mistakes analysis
Get instant feedback. Spot every mistake.
Topic ideas generator
Get topic-specific ideas to enhance your writing.
Vocabulary helper
Get the right words for any topic.
Progress tracking
Track your writing improvements.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

6.5
band
The government should tax unhealthy food to encourage people to eat more healthily. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. Write at least 250 words.
Opinions are divided over whether governments and regulators should impose higher taxes to keep the public away from unhealthy foods. I don't agree with the government interfering with people's choices as this would have a negative impact not only on society but on single families.
6.5
band
You should spend about 40 minutes on this task. Climate change is one of the biggest environmental problems of the 21st century. Some people think that humans should stop using oil, gas and coal and switch to alternative energy resources, such as wind and solar power. Others claim that fossil fuels are essential for many industries, and not using them will result in economic recession. What is your opinion? Support your point of view with relevant examples.
Climate change stands as one of the most pressing environmental challenges of the 21st century, necessitating a critical examination of our energy resources. While some argue for a swift transition from natural gas to alternative energy resources like wind and solar power, others contend that such a shift could trigger economic recession due to the indispensable role of fossil fuels in various industries. In navigating this complex issue, it is essential to strike a balance between environmental sustainability and economic viability.
7.5
band
Some people believe that professionals such as doctors and engineers should be required to work in the country where they did their training. Others believe they should be free to work in another country if they wish. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Should domestically trained specialists in areas such as medicine and engineering be obliged to pursue their careers in their homeland or should they be given the choice of working abroad? In this essay, I shall discuss both sides of this controversial issue before going on to state why I tend to agree with the need for them to remain in their countries at least in the short term.
4
band
More and more people are moving away from an agricultural background to relocate to cities in order to look for work . What will be the consequences of this? What solutions can you offer?
In this con-current age, numerous people have a propensity of relocating from agro-economic rural areas to urban cities for greater career opportunities. This essay accords that the prime outcomes associated with the tendency are worker shortages in the countryside and a surplus of the workforce in the metropolitan areas which becomes a responsible trend to create several issues in both regions and firstly, a multitude of government initiatives and secondly, arranging myriad youth based training programs to create attention for the villages can be taken as the most viable solutions.
7.5
band
It is better to children if the whole family including aunts, uncles and so on should be involved in a child’s upbringing, rather than just their parents. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Raising a child is an extremely difficult task and raising them to be a responsible citizen would be every parents dream. Some believe that involving family members such as aunts and uncles would have a positive impact when fostering a child. I completely agree with this argument, as I believe this would not only bring a great learning experience to a child, but also aid the young one to be a good law abiding citizen.

Q. Air pollution is currently a big issue in most industrialized cities causing respiratory problems and changes in weather patterns. What do you think are the causes of this? What measures can be taken to reduce air pollution?

Fully explain your ideas

The government should tax unhealthy food to encourage people to eat more healthily. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. Write at least 250 words.

Some people believe that professionals such as doctors and engineers should be required to work in the country where they did their training. Others believe they should be free to work in another country if they wish. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

More and more people are moving away from an agricultural background to relocate to cities in order to look for work . What will be the consequences of this? What solutions can you offer?

It is better to children if the whole family including aunts, uncles and so on should be involved in a child’s upbringing, rather than just their parents. To what extent do you agree or disagree?