At the present time,the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults,compared with the number of older people. Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?
The average
population
around the globe is going to get old on the information experts gathered. The age of the population
is a great issue to deal with for the governments
. However
, this
essay will look at the pros and cons of comparing the number of young and older people
. I will look at both sides of the argument.
First of all, economic and social situations could be effective for people
who want to have a new baby
. For instance
, if some parents are unemployed and cannot afford what the expected baby
wants such
as clothes, food, etc., they will give up on having a new baby
. Solving people
’s problems of having a new baby
can reduce the average amount of population
.
Another advantage is that governments
and people
who are in charge could be able to see the big picture of getting their labor
workers. Change the spelling
labour
For example
, replacing a young individual who is of course more ambitious than a person who is in the last
years of working can get motivation to them to have a new baby
.
Turning to the other side of the argument, increasing the number of crimes may be the result of comparing the younger generations with older ones in the long term. Nonetheless
, It does not matter that young people
or old people
can not afford the basic needs for their lives, they could become a thief or a murderers
to get what they want.
Another disadvantage could be not taking seriously the importance of responsibility of younger generations in the future. The younger generation must be trained and get involved with work or study to help both themselves and Correct the article-noun agreement
murderers
a murderer
governments
to count them as a useful citizen. A mixture of the experience of older people
and the energy and ambition of younger ones could help any society to improve itself.
To sum up
, there will be some advantages like boring new babies and hiring young people
for work and also
some drawbacks like an increasing number of crimes and not taking the young generation. In my view, decreasing the age of the population
is a great subject that governments
should be aware of.Submitted by bahram.azizzade on
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Task Achievement
Ensure your introduction clearly states the topic and your position on it. Your introduction briefly mentions the pros and cons but could be more specific about your stance.
Task Achievement
Each paragraph should start with a clear topic sentence that states the main idea of the paragraph. This will help the reader understand what to expect from each section of your essay.
Task Achievement
Work on developing your ideas more fully with specific examples. While you mention general scenarios, adding concrete examples or statistics could strengthen your argument.
Coherence and Cohesion
Make sure your essay has a clear overall structure. Use paragraphs effectively to separate your ideas, and ensure there's a logical flow from the introduction through to the conclusion.
Coherence and Cohesion
Be careful with your language use. Aim for clarity and accuracy in your expression. Watch out for grammatical errors and aim to vary your sentence structures to maintain reader interest.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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