In some countries the average weight of people is increasing and their levels of health and fitness are decreasing. What do you think are the cause of these problems and what measures could be taken to solve them?

#countries #weight #people #levels #health #fitness #measures

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It is a serious problem in some nations, that of the rising number of overweight people and the worsening of their health and fitness conditions. The main reason behind these trends is that practising

sports

is becoming unpopular,

while

the amount of those having a sedentary lifestyle is increasing.

This

essay will

also

argue why the optimal solution is building more

sports

facilities. Being unfit is often linked to little or no training at all because when a person does it, the body burns the fat in excess and it stimulates the growth of muscle tissues. If doing

sports

is not a common thing to do in a community, more people will be overweight, so be more likely to be unhealthy.

For example

, in countries where sedentary lifestyles are widespread,

such

as the United States, the share of citizens who are obese is very high, and so is the ratio of the population getting correlated diseases. The easiest way to solve

this

problem is to create places where everyone can do

sports

. With

such

a measure, they would be more accessible and the improvement of the incentive of training would help people to build healthy habits.

Such

a thing has happened in Japan, where an enormous amount of services,

such

as bikes or running shoes rent, are so popular that you can train virtually everywhere. The increasing concern over the growing of average weight and the decrease of the ratio of fit and healthy citizens

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

is bringing many to think of what are the causes of these changes and what actions should be pursued in order to make them stop.

This

essay has argued why the unpopularity of practising sport is one of the main reasons and that a measure to be taken is that the lack of

sport

Change the noun form

sports

show examples

facilities should be solved by building more of them.

Submitted by giordansamuele on Sun Mar 03 2024

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Expand on your main points with more detailed examples and evidences. Although you provided examples, further elaboration could strengthen your argument.

coherence cohesion

Organize your essay with clear logical progression. Use transition words to ensure smooth flow between paragraphs and within them.

coherence cohesion

Conclude your essay more effectively by summarizing your arguments and reaffirming your stance in a clear, concise manner.

coherence cohesion

Increase the variety of sentence structures used to convey your points. This enhances readability and demonstrates linguistic capability.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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5
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

308 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

sedentary
obesity
overweight
physical activity
sedentary lifestyle
exercise
unhealthy diet
fast food
urbanization
modernization
stress
awareness
education
government intervention
policies
promotion
sports
fitness programs
health education
taxation
public transportation
infrastructure
parks
recreational spaces

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In some countries the average weight of people is increasing and their levels of health and fitness are decreasing. What do you think are the cause of these problems and what measures could be taken to solve them?

Fully explain your ideas

Some argue that music mainly serves as a way for individuals to reduce their stress and anxiety. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

“Some people believe that managers are responsible for the company's success, while others think various features of the organization play vital role in it. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.”

Influence of human beings on the world's ecosystem is leading to the extinction of species and loss of bio-diversity. What are the primary causes of loss of bio-diversity? What solutions can you suggest?

Some people consider price as most important thing to think about when buying product (such as cell phone) or service (eg medical treatment). Do you agree or disagree?