in your opinion how can government of each country eradicate or lessen the crimes commited by their own people use specific reasons and details to support your answer
What strategies can each country’s government take to decrease or eliminate criminal
behavior
committed by its population?
There are numerous actions that authorities Change the spelling
behaviour
receive
to reduce crimes. One of the efforts of Verb problem
take
that is
that they have to enhance education in each town and country. Most illegal acts occur by adolescents due to
a lack of knowledge. When people, especially children, have access to universities or schools and good quality education, they tend to engage in criminal activities. For example
, when children study in schools that can not only offer outdoor activities such
as football but also
vocational training, they are less likely to attend to unlawful acts, and this
reduces the appeal of illegal activities. In addition
, governments in each country should reform the prison system that implements illegal works
. Providing support for former inmates in finding employment and housing upon release can Fix the agreement mistake
work
also
help prevent them from returning to crime
.
Regarding any issues that can decrease the crime
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
that
poverty, including unemployment or underemployment. Creating job opportunities or vocational training can help to reduce unemployment and offer alternatives to Correct determiner usage
apply
crime
. For instance
, South Africa is
the highest rate of unemployment country in the world because of their economy. Verb problem
has
Moreover
, the
social media Correct article usage
apply
also
plays a crucial role in crime
because many children nowadays addicted
to their own cells and they watch anything Add a missing verb
are addicted
in
it. To avoid Change preposition
on
this
trend, government
should put Add an article
the government
limit
Add an article
a limit
to
reels and even games, which Change preposition
on
has
Correct subject-verb agreement
have
significant
effect Add an article
a significant
in
Change preposition
on
person’s
brain system.
In conclusion, governments must focus on eradicating poverty, improving education, and creating jobs to reduce the desperation and inequality that often lead to criminal Correct article usage
a person’s
behavior
. By addressing these issues, governments can build a safer and more equitable society for all.Change the spelling
behaviour
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task response
The essay discusses several strategies that governments can implement to reduce crime, but it's essential to further develop the points made. Enhance the argument for education by providing more concrete examples and evidence. Additionally, mention how reformed prison systems have succeeded in specific contexts to strengthen this point.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which is good. However, the structure within the body paragraphs can be improved. Make sure each paragraph starts with a topic sentence that clearly indicates the main point. Also, make smoother transitions between ideas to improve readability.
relevance
Avoid generalizations and ambiguities. For example, your statement about South Africa being the highest unemployment country needs a source or more precise phrasing to be effective. Provide specific data or studies to back up your claims.
language
Proofread for grammatical mistakes and ensure proper sentence structure. For instance, the phrase 'authorities receive to reduce crimes' should be rephrased for clarity, and the use of 'cells' instead of 'cell phones' seems out of context. Minor mistakes can distract the reader from your main points.
coherence and cohesion
The essay has a clear conclusion that summarizes the main points effectively.
task response
You have made an effort to address different aspects of the problem, including education, poverty, and social media influence. This shows a comprehensive understanding of the topic.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?
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