In recent years, many small local shops have closed because customers travel to large shopping centres or malls to do their shopping. Is this a positive or a negative developnment?

A lot of small local stores had to shut their business
due to
clients
opting to buy from shopping malls and large-sized companies lately.
This
essay discusses the merits and drawbacks of
this
phenomenon. There are two main advantages of
people
[
prefering
Correct your spelling
preferring
] to buy from shopping centres. The first of [
this
is] that customers can often find higher product variety.
This
is because there are greater quantities of diversified store types inside a mall.
For instance
,
clients
can often find, from clothing articles and groceries[,] to furniture and home utensils there.
Moreover
, it can be easier to find products on sale and cheaper prices.
This
is
due to
several stores having to compete within themselves for their
clients
' money.
Therefore
,
people
can often buy more for less money there.
However
, there are
also
disadvantages to
this
. The most significant is that it does not promote [economy] diversity. When
people
mainly spend their cash in large centres, small-sized entrepreneurs are forced to stop doing business or even [get] bankrupt. As an example, several boutiques in my city have either closed or migrated to the shopping centre
due to
slow client flux and financial problems.
Furthermore
,
clients
often do not receive personal customer service in big stores.
This
is
due to
fewer [salesperson] having to deal with high amounts of customers at a time.
As a result
,
clients
often receive inferior customer service in large malls. In conclusion, the merits of
people
buying from shopping malls are that there [are] more product variety and often better prices
due to
sales. The downsides are that it is not [a]
economicaly
Correct your spelling
economically
diversified practice and there is usually poorer customer service.
Submitted by amandacflago23 on

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task response
Be attentive to your spelling ('prefering' should be 'preferring', 'economy' instead of 'economicaly', 'salesperson' instead of 'salesperson'). Consistency in word choice helps maintain clarity throughout your essay.
coherence and cohesion
For coherence and cohesion, focus on using a wider variety of linking words and phrases to connect your ideas more smoothly. While your essay has a logical structure, diversifying your transitional phrases can enhance readability and flow.
task response
To improve task achievement, try expanding your examples to be more detailed and specific. This will strengthen your argument and make your points more convincing to the reader.

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