Some people think that success in life comes from hard work and dtermination, while others think that there are more important factors such as money and appearance. Dicuss both views and give your opinion.
In today's competitive landscape, the pursuit of
wealth
and physical attractiveness has gained increasing prominence. While
some argue that success
is primarily tied to one's financial status and appearance, others contend that unwavering determination is the cornerstone of achieving genuine power. This
essay will delve into both viewpoints by examining a range of examples.
On one side of the spectrum, the emphasis on external beauty and wealth
has grown in significance in the digital era. Many individuals
prioritize lucrative careers in sectors such
as fashion or modeling
, leveraging their attractive looks to secure well-paid positions. Change the spelling
modelling
Similarly
, those who amass substantial wealth
often equate financial prosperity with personal fulfillment
and societal esteem. It is not uncommon to see affluent Change the spelling
fulfilment
individuals
flaunting their material possessions as symbols of success
.
Conversely
, the significance of hard work and ambition in attaining success
should not be underestimated. Individuals
who wholeheartedly commit themselves to their education or professions with perseverance and dedication are more likely to realize their objectives. For example
, students invest considerable effort in their studies before embarking on their careers, showcasing their dedication to future pursuits. Furthermore
, many accomplished entrepreneurs attribute their achievements to unwavering determination and resilience in pursuing their passions, even in the face of adversity.
In conclusion, while
the allure of wealth
and physical attractiveness may be appealing in contemporary society, it is ultimately one's determination and diligence that pave the path to genuine success
. Irrespective of external factors, individuals
who demonstrate steadfast commitment and perseverance are more likely to actualize their aspirations and experience enduring fulfillment
.Change the spelling
fulfilment
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Logical Structure
Ensure a clear and concise introduction that outlines the essay's structure, helping readers understand the flow of arguments.
Coherence & Cohesion
Use linking words effectively to ensure coherency between paragraphs and within sentences.
Supported Main Points
Incorporate more concrete examples to support your main points, enhancing the persuasiveness of your essay.
Complete Response
Focus on fully answering the question by covering all aspects of the task, including providing a balanced discussion of both views and your own opinion.
Clear & Comprehensive Ideas
Strive for clarity in presenting your ideas by organizing them in a logical and accessible manner.
Relevant & Specific Examples
Incorporate real-world examples or data to provide evidence for your arguments, making them more relevant and convincing.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?
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