Due to evelopment and rapid expansion of supermarkets in some countires, many small, local business are unable to compete. Some people think that the closure of local business will bring about the death of local communities. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
In today's society, It is probably true that big markets are appearing all over the city, the number of local
markekts
Correct your spelling
markets
are
decreasing Change the verb form
is
due to
the many advantages of larger malls. In my view, I agree strongly with this
viewpoint that rising of supermarkets give
the collapse of small communities.
One of the main reasons for going Verb problem
causes
mega
shopping centres Change preposition
to mega
are
Change the verb form
is
a
Correct article usage
the
accessibilitye
Correct your spelling
accessibility
to visit
the place. Verb problem
of
This
is to say, people
can shop anytime, regardless of weather, time, and even parking. For example
, most local malls are outdoors and often small, making it difficults
to shop in rainy weather, when you need a car with lots of luggage, or when you're pushing a stroller. Correct your spelling
difficult
On the other hand
, Big shops
are able to drive up after parking comfortably and buy the products no matter what the weather is. For
this
reason, people
who wanna
Verb problem
want
convience
shopping will Correct your spelling
convenience
convince
choice
Replace the word
choose
the
Correct article usage
apply
supermakets
Correct your spelling
supermarkets
supermarket
instead
of local communities.
Furhtermore
, the mega malls offer a wide Correct your spelling
Furthermore
ranges
of choices for Correct the article-noun agreement
range
people
who have desire
to purchase Change the article
the desire
everyting
they want in one place. Correct your spelling
everything
For instance
, if you want to get the cheese, small bussiness
provide only two or three popular cheeses, but Correct your spelling
businesses
a larger
Correct the article-noun agreement
larger shops
a larger shop
shops
will have 10 or more products for you. This
is because a larger bussiness
Correct your spelling
business
trade
with multiple international Fix the agreement mistake
trades
retailer
, Change to a plural noun
retailers
while
smaller ones use domestic. Thus
, many consumers will think the
big market when they need to buy something more and more rather than local Change preposition
of the
shop
.
In conclusion, I believe, Fix the agreement mistake
shops
people
will increasingly favor
larger Change the spelling
favour
shops
because big markets have both accessiblity
and shopping variety. Correct your spelling
accessibility
Due to
this
trend, small shops
have risk
of disappearance. Add an article
the risk
a risk
Hence
, I agree that
the above opinion.Change preposition
with
Submitted by dlwltn6615 on
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Language
For future essays, aim to proofread your work to catch and correct any spelling mistakes, such as 'development' instead of 'evelopment', 'local markets' vs. 'local markekts', 'convenience' instead of 'convience', and 'supermarkets' instead of 'supermakets'. Consistent attention to spelling can further refine your exceptional writing.
Language
Try to vary your sentence structures more to showcase your language skills. While your essay is well-organized and the ideas are clearly communicated, experimenting with complex sentence constructions can add further depth to your writing.
Structure
Consider using paragraph hooks or transitions to make the flow between paragraphs even smoother. You’re already doing a great job at maintaining coherence, but subtle connectors or thematic links at the end or beginning of paragraphs can enhance readability.
Task Response
Your essay excellently addresses the prompt, fully developing your argument with well-supported points. This level of detailed analysis significantly strengthens your response.
Coherence and Cohesion
Your logical structuring of the essay, including a clear introduction, body paragraphs with distinct points, and a summarizing conclusion, enhances the coherence and cohesion of your work. Great job maintaining this structure throughout.
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