Studies suggest that many teenagers these days prefer socialising online to meeting one another in person. Why do you think this is the case? What measures could be taken to encourage teenagers to spend more time meeting one another in person?
In
this
modern era, people have shifted their focus from in-person meetings
to virtual meetings
. Especially teenagers
are more affected and prefer to meet new people online rather than meeting them in person. There are various reasons behind this
fashion, this
essay will discuss those and outline some solutions to break this
chain.
To begin
with, there can be multiple reasons behind this
trend among teenagers
. One of the primary reasons can be, that after COVID-19, many schools shifted their lectures from offline to online. In other words
, most of the teenagers
got addicted towards smartphones and the virtual world. As a result
, Due to
Covid-19, people started meeting online as there were restrictions but that influenced many teenagers
in a negative way. For instance
, teenagers
were excited to meet one another at a park near my house. After the pandemic, the park is quiet as all the teenagers
now meet online on Facebook or Instagram.
Furthermore
, every problem has a solution, in this
case, the best solution can be the parents
. Socializing with other teenagers
should be taught by the parents
. Additionally
, Parents
should also
introduce their children to new activities like Baseball, Cricket or any team-level game. For example
, my brother was also
addicted to online chatting and meetings
. However
, my parents
encouraged and supported him to play physical sports and games. Hence
, parents
are the best supporters of teenagers
who are addicted to online meetings
.
In conclusion, the pandemic was the main reason behind this
change among teenagers
and the primary solution is, constant support from the parents
towards their children. Also
, this
addiction can be harmful to their professional growth if it remains unchanged.Submitted by tirththakkar23 on
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coherence cohesion
Your essay is well-structured and contains an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. To enhance coherence, consider using more varied linking words and phrases. Additionally, make sure each paragraph flows smoothly from one idea to the next without abrupt transitions.
task achievement
You have addressed the task prompt effectively, but expanding on the points about why teenagers prefer socializing online, beyond just the impact of COVID-19, would strengthen your argument. Consider incorporating other factors like the convenience of online communication or the influence of social media trends in your discussion.
task achievement
Be mindful of small grammatical errors and inconsistencies. For example, the phrase "many teenagers got addicted towards smartphones" should be "many teenagers got addicted to smartphones." Also, ensure that examples are clear and directly support the points you're making.
coherence cohesion
Your essay is clear and easy to follow, with a well-defined structure including an introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion.
task achievement
You provided relevant examples, such as the one about teenagers meeting online after COVID-19 and your brother's experience, which help illustrate your points.
Your opinion
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Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
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