IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Some people think everyone should be a vegetarian because we do not need to eat meat to stay healthy.  To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #meat
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In contemporary society, it is becoming popular among people to be vegetarians. I partially agree with
this
 notion, as eating
meat
 consistently has a bad impact on our health.
However
, vegetables do not have some special ingredients that the human body requires. Nowadays, individuals are choosing a healthy lifestyle and quitting eating
meat
 because it has a bad effect on
our
Correct pronoun usage
their
show examples
 bodies and health conditions.
As
Correct word choice
Meat
show examples
meat
 is high in cholesterol and saturated fat, which build up in the body, clog arteries, and stop the heart from working properly.
Additionally
,
meat
 has some bacteria, which are mostly killed
while
 cooking but do not dissipate the toxins made by them.
For instance
, eating just two servings of
meat
 a week will increase your risk of suffering from heart disease.
Thus
, as humans are worried about their lifestyle and want to build a healthy life, they are realizing how bad consuming
meat
 is and trying to be vegetarians.
On the other hand
, some people may claim that vegetables do not have the appropriate amount of nutrients that only
meat
 does. The high quantity and quality of
meat
 proteins provide a higher nutrient density than plant proteins.
Furthermore
,
meat
 proteins
also
 contain a lot of
iron
. The
iron
 in
meat
 is much more absorbent than the
iron
 found in vegetables.
For example
, the intake and status of vitamin B12, vitamin D,
iron
, zinc, iodine, calcium, and bone turnover markers were generally lower in plant-based dietary patterns compared to
meat
-eaters.
In addition
, vegans had the lowest vitamin B12, calcium, and iodine intake,
as well as
 lower iodine status and lower bone mineral density.
Consequently
, as
meat
 has some crucial ingredients that our body requires, people should eat an allocated quantity of
meat
 products. In conclusion,
while
 it is beneficial and healthier to not eat
meat
 as it has some bad ingredients, it is
also
 important to eat it in an appropriate amount as it gives some nutrients that plants do not have.
Submitted by makemoneyizzy16 on

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complete response
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logical structure
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