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Writing Samples
Band 6

The graph shows the average Japanese month salary (Yen) from 1953 to 1983, and the prices of black and white televisions and color televisions during the same period.

The graph shows the average Japanese month salary (Yen) from 1953 to 1983, and the prices of black and white televisions and color televisions during the same period.
#japanese #month #salary #yen #prices #televisions #color #period
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The line graph depicts information about monthly salaries in Japan between 1953 and 1983,
comparing
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compared
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 with the black and white, and colour
TVs
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TV
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prices
 during the same
period
.
Overall
,
it is clear that
 the payment salaries have increased substantially all over the
period
,
while
colored
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coloured
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 and black & white
TV
 dropped in its
values
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value
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 in the same time studied. As we can see in the graph, it is notable that the values of
Japanes
Correct your spelling
Japanese
 salaries have climbed dramatically from 30 (
Yen
) to 180 (
Yen
) over the twenty-year
period
.
In contrast
, Black & white
TV
 which stood at 100 (
Yen
) in 1953 fell steadily to just under 40 (
Yen
)
in
Change the preposition
at
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 the end of the
period
.
Lastly
, in the year
of
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apply
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1958 Colored
TV
prices
 declined rapidly by almost 70 (
Yen
) from 180 to roughly 110 afterward continued its trend went down slowly
at
Change preposition
to
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 90 (
Yen
). Another interesting feature is that the monthly salary and
TV
prices
 were the same value in two points: 60 (
Yen
) for Black & white
TV
 costs in 1963
at
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apply
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, and 100 (
Yen
) for
colored
Change the spelling
coloured
show examples
TV
prices
 in 1968.
Submitted by jolo9419jmor on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words prices, period, tv, yen with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "graph" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
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