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Writing Samples
Band 6

The graph shows the average Japanese month salary (Yen) from 1953 to 1983, and the prices of black and white televisions and color televisions during the same period.

The graph shows the average Japanese month salary (Yen) from 1953 to 1983, and the prices of black and white televisions and color televisions during the same period.
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The line graph depicts information about monthly salaries in Japan between 1953 and 1983,
comparing
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compared
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 with the black and white, and colour
TVs
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TV
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prices
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 during the same
period
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.
Overall
Linking Words
,
it is clear that
Linking Words
 the payment salaries have increased substantially all over the
period
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,
while
Linking Words
colored
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coloured
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 and black & white
TV
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 dropped in its
values
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value
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 in the same time studied. As we can see in the graph, it is notable that the values of
Japanes
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Japanese
 salaries have climbed dramatically from 30 (
Yen
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) to 180 (
Yen
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) over the twenty-year
period
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.
In contrast
Linking Words
, Black & white
TV
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 which stood at 100 (
Yen
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) in 1953 fell steadily to just under 40 (
Yen
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)
in
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at
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 the end of the
period
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.
Lastly
Linking Words
, in the year
of
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apply
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1958 Colored
TV
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prices
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 declined rapidly by almost 70 (
Yen
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) from 180 to roughly 110 afterward continued its trend went down slowly
at
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to
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 90 (
Yen
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). Another interesting feature is that the monthly salary and
TV
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prices
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 were the same value in two points: 60 (
Yen
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) for Black & white
TV
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 costs in 1963
at
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apply
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, and 100 (
Yen
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) for
colored
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coloured
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TV
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prices
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 in 1968.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words prices, period, tv, yen with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "graph" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
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