Most societies have its homeless people. Some people think that the best way to help them is to give them money. To what extent do you agree?
Some people want governments to spend
money
looking for life on other planets
.
Others, however
, think this
is a waste of public money
when there are so many problems on earth.
Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
The space
is a tempting topic. Many people are fascinated by the idea of surfing the space
and impressed by the astronauts who have the courage to investigate the unknown. However
, all of this
demands a lot of investments from the government that
leads to the question: is it worth Correct pronoun usage
which
to spend
Change the verb form
spending
money
on looking for life on other planets
?
A crucial aspect to highlight is that almost all of the resources on Earth are limited. Improvements of
Change preposition
in
the
society require the drain of our own planet and, unfortunately, not everything can be replenished. At some point, Correct article usage
apply
the
humanity will come to Correct article usage
apply
the
dead end if the Earth is not able to offer anything for our survival. Correct article usage
a
However
, by exploring the
Correct article usage
apply
space
, we can reach other planets
with resources, escaping the doom. For instance
, recently researchers have discovered flying objects with minerals required which are useful for every factory.
Conversely
, travelling to space
demands enormous investments from the government. It is common that they can be almost equal to the budget of other crucial fields such
as education. To illustrate this
point, the money
spent on space
projects in Russia exceed
the budget of several poor regions. At Change the verb form
exceeds
this
point, donations to those parts of the country could be more beneficial.
In my opinion, the science is as crucial as every other parts
of our society. Support of it causes the astounding growth that nothing else is able to provide. Change to a singular noun
part
The
Correct article usage
Space
space
exploration is the
piece of science which is impossible to take out. Correct article usage
a
Although
the donations to investigation
of other Add an article
the investigation
an investigation
planets
are enormous, without them we can miss unbelievable discoveries.Submitted by dulskywork on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
grammar
Improve the grammar and sentence structure to make the arguments clearer and more impactful. For instance, the sentence 'at some point, the humanity will come to the dead end if the Earth is not able to offer anything for our survival' could be rewritten for clarity.
content development
Expand the discussion on the opposing view with more detailed examples. For instance, discussing the impact on education or healthcare more extensively can strengthen the argument.
coherence
Ensure a balanced discussion by giving equal weight to both views before presenting your own opinion. Currently, the essay leans more towards space exploration, making the discussion somewhat biased.
conclusion
Work on improving the conclusion to make it more impactful and summarizing. For instance, reiterate both views briefly and clearly state your stance with strong justifications.
introduction
Good introduction that sets the context for the discussion and engages the reader.
examples
Effective use of examples to support the points, such as the mention of Russia's space budget compared to its poor regions.
conclusion
Strong closing opinion that ties back to the importance of science and space exploration.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.