Obesity is a serious problem in many countries, especially in rich countries. Discuss ways to solve the problem. Provide specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

#obesity #countries #support

Undoubtedly, the proliferating rate of diseases like obesity in profound nations is a topic of concern. There are a plethora of reasons

such

as packed stuff, technology, fast food and a lot more behind

this

global issue. We need to take significant actions to mitigate

this

health problem and support people to live a salubrious life.

This

essay will discuss the various measures in detail. First of all, we should raise awareness among the youth and motivate them to participate in some sports activities in their free time in order to stay agile and fit.

Thus

this

results in diverging them from video games and blessing them with their holistic development. To illustrate, a recent study by the World Health Organisation claimed that 35% of toddlers are overweight because they spend most of their time with smart gadgets.

Secondly

, in

this

fast-paced era, we prefer everything to be quick and food is no more exception. Consuming hamburgers and ready-to-cook meals can save us time

nevertheless

these diets come with ample calories and preservatives which can drastically impact the human body.

Therefore

, the government should intervene and make some stringent rules for the food industry to produce products with minimal preservatives.

For example

, a recent survey done around the globe has revealed that rural citizens of India are healthier than urban individuals because they prefer eating fresh cuisine over packed foodstuff. In summary, I think the above-mentioned preventive actions should help the countries to put a pause on

this

growing obesity problem and make the planet Earth a healthier place to live.

Submitted by joshi65201 on Mon Jul 22 2024

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

clear comprehensive ideas

Ensure that ideas are consistently clear and comprehensive. At times, the sentences could be more concise to enhance readability.

supporting main points

While the essay has good examples, aim to delve deeper into connecting these examples more seamlessly with your arguments.

logical structure

Consider varying sentence structures to improve the overall flow and readability of the essay.

introduction conclusion present

The introduction clearly presents the topic and outlines the key issues contributing to obesity.

introduction conclusion present

The conclusion effectively summarizes the main points and states the importance of taking preventive actions.

logical structure

The essay is logically structured, with paragraphs focused on distinct points (awareness and sports activities, fast food consumption, and government intervention).

relevant specific examples

Relevant examples, such as the studies from WHO and a global survey on Indian rural citizens, are used to support the arguments.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

261 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 9.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

5
band
During a recent plane jurney, you sat next to a businessman who owns a chain of restaurant.You talked to him and suggested that you should cantact him about a possible job in one of his restourants. ● remind him when and where you met ● tell him what kind of job you are interested in ● say why you think you would be suitable for the job
I am writing to express my interestings in a possible job opportunity at one of your restaurant . We had a conversation durring the flight on 12th march. In addition to this you told me that I will work one of your restaurant.
6
band
Many people work long hours, leaving very little time for leisure activities. Does this situation have more advantages or more disadvantages? Give reason for your answer and include any relevant example from your own knowledge or experience.
Working overtime is becoming a lifestyle for many workers nowadays, causing them to have a limited or even no time to pursue their personal interests. While there are some benefits, such as the ability to gain an extra income and fasten one’s career progression; the drawbacks, namely an increase in depression level and unhealthy lifestyle, are draconian.
7
band
Getting promotion is one of the biggest drives for people to apply themselves and work hard in modern workplace. Why do you think people are so driven to get promotion? What other factors influence people to work hard?
The main reason why people work hard in the workplace is they have opportunities for advancement. I think people who have such passion do that because of the reward they can gain through being promoted, such as an increased salary and a higher position.I will express why these are the reasons and what also influences workers to work hard.
5
band
Some university students want to learn about other subjects in addition to their main subjects. Others believe it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for a qualification. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Good education is what makes us qualified for the job that we are interested in but getting education dosen't mean only going to good university. Some students prefer improve their skills, learn how to work with information in addition to their main subjects, but some of them thinks that the main thing is getting good grades. In this essay we will discuss both these opinions and show their advantages and drawbacks.
<4
band
International organizations should provide developing countries with practical aid and advice rather than financial aid.To what extent do you agree or disagree?
It is thought that practical aid ought to be provided and advised to developing countries instead of financial aid by international organizations, in my aspect, I partially agree with the thought.

Obesity is a serious problem in many countries, especially in rich countries. Discuss ways to solve the problem. Provide specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

Many people work long hours, leaving very little time for leisure activities. Does this situation have more advantages or more disadvantages? Give reason for your answer and include any relevant example from your own knowledge or experience.

Getting promotion is one of the biggest drives for people to apply themselves and work hard in modern workplace. Why do you think people are so driven to get promotion? What other factors influence people to work hard?

Some university students want to learn about other subjects in addition to their main subjects. Others believe it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for a qualification. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

International organizations should provide developing countries with practical aid and advice rather than financial aid.To what extent do you agree or disagree?