IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Plastic bags, plastic bottlrs and plastic packing are bad for the environment. What damage does plastic do to the environment? What can be done by governments and individuals to solve this problem?

#plastic #bags #bottlrs #environment #damage #governments #individuals
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Currently, most industries are using
plastic
due to
the
Change the word
its
show examples
 convenience.
However
, there are statements that
plastic
 is causing pollution. In
this
 essay, I will talk about the bad impacts of wasted
plastic
 and solutions to address the problems. First of all wasted
plastic
 is running our nature and our body. We can find
this
 element everywhere, including the deep ocean and the top of the highest mountain in the world. Our animal friends are dying
due to
 abandoned
plastic
 stuff. These animals often eat trash because they recognize
plastic
 in their food. not only animals but
also
 human beings eat a lot of
plastic
 during their lifetime.
According to
 current research, once a week, one person consumes a credit card-size
plastic
.
This
 is because, we are using a lot of
plastic
 goods daily, and meanwhile our body absorbs micro-sized
plastic
 pieces. Fortunately, we have diverse solutions to resolve
this
 pollution.
This
 first solution is reducing the usage of
plastic
. Nowadays, many industries tend to use paper products,
such
 as shopping bags or packages, rather than things with
plastic
. These movements can be inconvenient for us.
However
, there are the only ways that individuals can assist the government, they should offer investments to companies that can develop technologies to accelerate to remove the
plastic
. Currently, there are a number of technologies that are released to convert wasted
plastic
 stuff to oil.
This
 innovation will entirely wash out the
plastic
 from on earth. The wasted plastics are causing a lot of disadvantages to our planet and individuals.
Therefore
, people should not use plastics in their daily lives and the government has to support companies that are developing technologies related to
plastic
 removal.
Submitted by insighttribez on

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coherence cohesion
To improve coherence and cohesion, ensure that all ideas logically flow from one to another. For example, consider using more transitional phrases and connecting sentences to create a smoother flow. Also, ensure each paragraph has a clear topic and concluding sentence.
task achievement
For better task achievement, aim to provide more detailed and specific examples to support your points. Personal anecdotes or referencing specific studies can add depth to your arguments and make them more persuasive.
introduction conclusion present
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps organize the main points effectively.
complete response
The response is complete and addresses both parts of the task adequately, discussing the damage plastic does to the environment and suggesting solutions.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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