Some people think painting and drawings are important as other subjects. They should be compulsory in high school education. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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These days, the ways of teaching and learning are so varied from the previous, so a group of people believe that it is important to teach not only paintings but
also
drawings in high schools. I subscribe to
this
idea owing to the fact that some pupils like arts categories
also
, It usually helps
students
to have fun times. On the one hand, if institutes teach drawing and painting, the
students
who like these
things
are demonstrating the best
things
;
additionally
, some
students
like them and follow them in the higher education degrees.
For instance
, in my high school, we had an
art
class that taught us how to paint, draw, and so on;
moreover
, one of my classmates who was very good at sciences in
this
class liked
art
and
then
she followed
art
while
she was good at mathematics.
On the other hand
, most of the time the lessons that are taught in schools are really serious and stressful;
as a result
,
art
items make situations for
students
to relax time with beautiful
things
that help them feel stressed. To illustrate, a number of
students
who are studying engineering at the university create extraordinary paintings or drawings inasmuch as they are aimed too far from hard positions
such
as Leonardo Davinchi, who was the best science man and created the Monalizza portrait.
To conclude
, the kind of population thinks both paintings and drawings are not nice lessons;
nevertheless
, I advise that these
things
help
students
to have a fun time and find their favourite
things
.
Submitted by maryamkazemi968 on

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task achievement
Try to clearly present your position on the topic in the introduction. Whether you predominantly agree or disagree should be clear from the beginning.
task achievement
Use more relevant examples to support your main points. For instance, you can provide evidence from studies that link art education with improved academic performance or creativity.
coherence cohesion
Work on your transitions between ideas and paragraphs to ensure your essay flows logically. Each paragraph should have a clear main idea supported by relevant supporting sentences.
coherence cohesion
Your essay would benefit from a stronger conclusion summarizing the points made and restating your position more clearly.
task achievement
The essay has a clear understanding of the task and attempts to address it fully by discussing both sides.
task achievement
You provided a personal anecdote which helps to make the argument relatable and engaging.
coherence cohesion
Ideas are logically ordered, making the essay easy to follow.

Fully explain your ideas

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  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
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  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • artistic expression
  • communication
  • self-expression
  • creativity
  • critical thinking skills
  • cultural appreciation
  • understanding
  • therapeutic benefits
  • mental well-being
  • career opportunities
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