IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

The diagram below shows the recycling process of aluminium cans.

The diagram below shows the recycling process of aluminium cans.
The diagram gives information about how
Use synonyms
aluminum
Change the spelling
aluminium
show examples
cans
Use synonyms
 are recycled .
Overall
Linking Words
, there are seven stages of recycling
Use synonyms
aluminum
Change the spelling
aluminium
show examples
cans
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, starting with throwing the used
cans
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,
to
Change preposition
into
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 the garbage bins. The initial stage begins with people disposing
into
Change preposition
of into
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 special bins for
Use synonyms
aluminum
Change the spelling
aluminium
show examples
cans
Use synonyms
 only.
Then
Linking Words
, the specialized which is driven by
worker
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workers
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, collects the
cans
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 and puts them into a box for
further
Linking Words
 refinement. The collected cons go through several steps in a special machine: Cleaning, sorting, shredding and compressing. To be specific, the next stage involves cleaning
of
Change preposition
apply
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contaminants, organizing
cans
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, breaking them into small pieces and pressing all of the
cans
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. The next stage putting all compressed mass into a bucket where hot
temperature
Fix the agreement mistake
temperatures
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are
Change the verb form
is
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 applied to
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aluminum
Change the spelling
aluminium
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 to melt it, so that, the melted liquid is made into the shape of the roller. Its thickness is from 2.5 mm to 6 mm. The rolled material
take
Change the verb form
takes
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 the shape of
aluminum
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cans
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.
Finally
Linking Words
, recycled
cans
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 are reduced,
for example
Linking Words
,as
Coca-cola
Correct your spelling
Coca-Cola
show examples
cans
Use synonyms
. In the UK 74% of
Use synonyms
aluminum
Change the spelling
aluminium
show examples
cans
Use synonyms
 are recycled.

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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Basic structure: Change the second paragraph.
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Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words aluminum, cans with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Only 4 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • recycling process
  • aluminum cans
  • collection phase
  • sorting and cleaning
  • contaminants
  • crushing
  • melting phase
  • molded
  • energy efficiency
  • environmental benefits
  • economy
  • sustainable practices
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