Many people think technological devices such as smartphones, tablets and mobile phones bring more disadvantages than advantages. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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Introduction

Global inhabitants have various perspectives on electronic devices. A group of them think that the drawbacks of smartphones, tablets and so forth can eclipse the benefits. I do not subscribe to

this

Linking Words

idea inasmuch as that these gadgets develop the quality of lifestyles and communication.

Body paragraph 1

On the one hand, the fact

that is

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really important is that when populations have the newest phones or other devices like that, they do not carry a lot of elements with them.

In other words

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, technology creates a chance for global citizens to have small tools with less weight and so light and have a lot of merits .

For example

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, they are able to read books, take photos, call other people , watch movies and so forth.

Body paragraph 2

On the other hand

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, technological advancement provides an opportunity for globalization on account of the fact that communities across the world communicate with each other to enhance their knowledge about cultural diversity

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

and help them to share information and news with international citizens.

In addition

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, if people have access to digital technology, the companies will become international businesses. In fact, they have a positive economic impact on not only their countries but

also

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other area's economies.

Conclusion

To sum up

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, in my personal view, technology has a positive influence on the world's improvements because it creates a chance for people to have and easily access to all gadgets without any problems.

Furthermore

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, they can interact with other societies to share social norms and data and improve their financial status around the world.

maryamkazemi968

Jan 16, 2025

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task achievement

Try to provide more specific examples to support your points. For instance, mention specific apps or functions that improve lifestyle or examples where companies have benefited from globalization.

coherence cohesion

Ensure the topic sentences of each paragraph clearly reflect the main idea of the paragraph. This will enhance the reader's understanding.

coherence cohesion

Excellent introduction and conclusion that clearly outline your stance and summarize the main points discussed.

task achievement

Clear and comprehensive ideas presented with logical arguments supporting your point that technology improves communication and lifestyle.

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9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

255 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Technological advancement
Digital communication
Information accessibility
Global connectivity
Virtual interaction
Data privacy concerns
Social isolation
Health implications
Screen time
Dependence on technology

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