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Writing Samples
Band 6

Some people think the government should take measures regarding the healthy lifestyles of individuals. Others think it must be managed by individuals. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

There is no denying the fact that individual health patterns have become a topic of increasing concern in today's world.
While
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 some
people
Use synonyms
 believe that governments should take the lead in promoting
this
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 activity, others argue that
people
Use synonyms
 should be responsible for managing their own eating habits. In my opinion, I believe that personal health should be a top priority, as it reflects an essential truth about self-control. In the following paragraphs, I will examine the key points, outline the reasons behind my opinion, and provide relevant examples to support the discussion.
To begin
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 with, there are several advantages to healthy lifestyles.
Firstly
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, when it comes to individuals, building healthy habits and following a consistent lifestyle for their own physical and mental health can gradually improve self-confidence.
In addition
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, individuals must rely on themselves and be strong enough to
recognize
Change the spelling
recognise
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 what is beneficial and what is harmful for their bodies. In terms of
the
Correct article usage
apply
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governments, taking the upper hand and controlling their citizens' lifestyles is extremely difficult.
In other words
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, humans differ in their bodies and physical conditions, and our dynamics vary from one person to another.
Therefore
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, governments cannot establish a universal healthy lifestyle that suits everyone, because each individual has different needs.
For example
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, some
people
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 have allergies to certain kinds of food or disabilities that prevent them from doing activities, and these kinds of obstacles need to be taken into consideration. In conclusion,
although
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 some
people
Use synonyms
 may have different views, I believe that individuals play the most important role in shaping their own healthy lifestyles.

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content
Make your view clear in the body and restate it in the conclusion. Add more detail to both sides.
structure
Use topic sentence in each paragraph and link ideas with also, but, however.
example
Give real life examples or simple facts to back up points.
language
Fix small grammar and keep phrases simple and exact.
language
Avoid repeating words. Use some new idea each time.
content
Clear view on topic.
structure
Good overall structure with intro, body, and conclusion.
content
Some good ideas on personal role in health.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • government
  • rules
  • laws
  • taxes
  • ads
  • advertising
  • junk food
  • healthy food
  • exercise
  • health
  • public health
  • campaign
  • school meals
  • work place
  • education
  • choice
  • freedom
  • responsibility
  • cost
  • benefit
  • risk
  • ban
  • label
  • warning
  • policy
  • balance
  • support
  • improve
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