IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6

People tend to work longer hours nowadays. Working long hours has a negative effect on themselves their families and the society so working hours should be restricted. Do you agree or disagree?

#people #work #hours #effect #families #society
Working longer hours
is getting
Suggestion
are getting
 more common in today’s society. I personally believe that
this
 trend not only has a severe impact on the workers themselves, but
also
 on their families and the
community
 as a whole.
Therefore
, I totally agree with the idea of limiting working hours. A few decades ago, a person normally worked an average of eight hours per day. Average daily working hours in recent years,
however
, have significantly increased to ten or even fourteen.
This
, in my opinion, adversely affects employees’ health and productivity.
For example
, people who spend longer at
work
 are more likely to suffer from various health issues, ranging from fatigue to more serious problems like anxiety disorders or even stroke
.
Accept space
.
 Failing health leads to more sick leave
,
Accept space
,
 poor
work
 performance and low productivity. My cousin is a case in point. Working nearly twelve hours on a daily basis, he frequently feels exhausted and makes more errors at
work
 than he used to. I
also
 think that
extended hours
Suggestion
the extended hours
 of
work
has
Suggestion
have
 serious consequences for families and communities
.
Accept space
.
 At the family level, busy working schedules prevent people from taking frequent family trips or even just having meals together. Relationships among members are greatly weakened if they cannot make
time
 for each other. In terms of
community
 life, overworked people do not devote
time
 to voluntary activity that brings benefits for their society. My uncle,
for example
, hardly has
time
 for local
community
 service projects
such
 as conservation
work
 or working with a charity because he works more than sixty hours per week. In conclusion, I would argue that working
time
 should be reduced since the frequency of long working hours exerts an adverse effect on employees, their family bonds and their
community
.
Submitted by naresh on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: