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Band 4.5

There is an increasing amount of advertising directed at children, which encourages them to buy goods such as toys and snacks. Many parents are worried that these advertisements put too much pressure on children, while some advertisers claim that they provide useful information to children. Discuss both views and give your opinion

#amount #children #goods #toys #snacks #parents #advertisements #pressure #advertisers #information
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Nowadays, due to burgeoning technological advances, youngsters are exposed to lots of commercials that persuades them to buy goods. What are the implications?. Some parents are concerned that these promotions mount
pressures
Suggestion
pressure
 on their children while the advertisers claim that they provide crucial information to minors. Let us examine both
veiws
a way of regarding situations or topics etc.
views
voice
veils
 and
profer
present for acceptance or rejection
proffer
 my opinion before reaching a concrete decision. Undoubtedly, exposing children to adverts
have
Suggestion
has
 certain drawbacks and parents are worried about them.
Firstly
, it makes children to become
consumerists
. To illustrate, exposing juveniles to certain adverts can make them to exhibit over possessive attitudes.
For instance
, these days adverts on toys are common. Children persuade parents to get them
such
 items without thinking of the financial burden it
possess
Suggestion
possesses
 to their parents.
Consequently
,
commercial
Suggestion
the commercial
 could lead to
gluttony
. Children believe in what the see on television promotions not minding the dangers involved.
For example
 coca cola adverts
is
Suggestion
are
 deceptive and
this
 might lead to
gluttony
 on
such
products
Accept comma addition
products, hence
hence
 chronic complications that can result from
gluttony
such
 diabetes and high blood pressure
arises
move upward
rises
.
Conversely
, promoters
advocates
Suggestion
advocate
 that they provide useful
informations
a message received and understood
information
to
Suggestion
for
 children through advertisements because certain adverts are educative. Some adverts
educates
Suggestion
educate
 minors on how to become good statesmen and how to practice good hygiene.
For instance
, the popular food brand Moko
spranga
the season of growth
sprang
 promotes good hygiene cultures in juveniles.
Furthermore
, commercials can be used to create
awarness
having knowledge of
awareness
 on the importance of vaccination
to
Suggestion
for
 children. To illustrate, most parents get to know about the importance of vaccine through the media.A recent publication on
Newyork time magazine
Suggestion
the Newark time magazine
Newark time magazine
 has shown that
informations
a message received and understood
information
 on polio and malaria vaccines spread faster through television adverts. By and large, commercials educates and help to create
awarness
having knowledge of
awareness
 on
importance
Suggestion
the importance
 of vaccination. From my perspective, I believe that commercials are
important
Accept comma addition
important, however
however
 certain advertisements mount
pressures
Suggestion
pressure
 on
parents
Accept comma addition
parents, therefore
therefore
, government should put checks to monitor and curtail irrelevant adverts. To
recapitualate
summarize briefly
recapitulate
, the expansion in technology has made adverts to become ubiquitous. It mounts
pressures
Suggestion
pressure
 on parents because it makes children to become consumerist and
also
 to result to
gluttony
.
However promoters
Accept comma addition
However, promoters
 claims adverts
is
Suggestion
are
 useful because it is educative and can be used to create
awarness
having knowledge of
awareness
. I
reteriate
to say, state, or perform again
reiterate
 my opinion that commercials are important and that
government
Suggestion
the government
 should monitor and curtail irrelevant ones.
Submitted by Serhii Baraniuk on

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    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
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  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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