Some people believe that in order for a hobby to be enjoyable, it needs to be difficult in some way. Do you agree or disagree?

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A recent study shows that it is important for us to have at least one

hobby

Use synonyms

to refresh our mind. We can choose a

hobby

Use synonyms

that suits us, either playing games or doing sports. Some people believe that an enjoyable

hobby

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should be challenging. In

this

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essay, I shall give some facts and opinions to support

this

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statement.

To begin

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with,

human brain

Suggestion

the human brain

is complex, it always looks for uncertainty.

For example

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, we do not want to read the

last

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page before starting to read a new novel and we get mad when someone spoil the plot of a new movie in the cinema. As it is mentioned above, our brain tends to look for uncertainty,

this

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is why mysterious novels and unpredictable movie endings attract people the most.

Second

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, human is a competitive creature. Our ability to compete and solve

problems make

Accept comma addition

problems, make

the human-being survives until now. Regarding doing their hobbies, people always look for new challenges and competitions to prove their power and glory.

For example

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, some official game competitions and sport matches are held all over the world and game developers always create games which divided into several difficulty levels. People feel satisfied if they can manage the easy level and go

further

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to the

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level.

Furthermore

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, people

also

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feel fulfilled if they can compete their rival.

This

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satisfaction feeling

cause

Suggestion

causes

the excretion of dopamine hormone which can make us feel happy and addicted to it. In conclusion, it is scientifically proven that people

tent

have a tendency or disposition to do or be something; be inclined

tend

to get bored if their

hobby

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is not challenging. The sense of uncertainty and competition are two main factors that people look for in their hobbies.

Hence

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, I believe that in order for a

hobby

Use synonyms

to be enjoyable, it needs to be difficult in some ways.

mega.watty1994Sat Jul 06 2019

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10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

295 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

sense of accomplishment
overcoming obstacles
gratifying
continuous source of enjoyment
relaxing activities
unwind and de-stress
counterproductive
mental break
subjective
personal preference

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