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Band 7

Many parents today employ private tutors to teach their children after school hours. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

#parents #tutors #children #school #hours #development
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Schools play an important role for children's academical performance, yet many parents do not believe that the education their children take in schools is enough,
as a result
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, they prefer to hire private tutors for their children after school.
However
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,
although
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 students tend to miss an opportunity to spend time with their peers or family, I believe that the trend is a wholly positive for students.
To begin
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 with, it is argued that children are already busy with their academic timetable and homeworks given by their class teachers. In fact, the students grades vary and some students are way behind from their classmates, I,
therefore
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, believe that learning with private tutors after school hours can fill the gap between the students who have better performance and the ones who performed poorly. Another benefit to hire a tutor is that they tend to aim to improve the students' grades in a short time period, which is especially necessary for peers who hope to get into renown institutes,
such
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 as Oxford and Cambridge university. I concede that it could be unfair to pupils from low-income household due to the expensive tutoring fee, it is worth to invest the amount of money for their own kids to let them have more choices in their future. To sum up, not only employing a tutor can improve students grades so as to follow their peers, tutors
also
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 help their students go to
the better
Suggestion
the best
 universities in the future.
Therefore
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, I believe that the trend of parents providing a tutor for their sons or daughters brings more advantages.
Submitted by Erina on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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