Some people believe that schools should include competitive sports as a subject while others believe that it has negative effects on children. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #schools #sports #effects #children

In our modern world, more and more children spend more and more time engaging in activities which include competitive sports at school. There are people who argue that

this

is beneficial to children while others disagree. On the one

hand

, on a day to day

basis children

Suggestion

basis with children

must sit in class for many hours a day which is too much for many of them.

In addition

, it is a well known fact that they have a lot of energy.

Therefore

, from my perspective, doing activities

such

as football and basketball could make them to be more relaxed during normal

hours which

Accept comma addition

hours, which

will lead to higher marks in tests and achievements.

Additionally

, studies which were conducted in schools have shown that achieving high scores

Suggestion

tests

goes

Suggestion

hand

with taking part in competitive sports.

For example

, as far as I can remember, in my school days on Sundays It was easy to understand the teacher since we played football, whereas on the other days understanding him was like fighting an uphill battle.

On the other

hand

, while I do not agree

Suggestion

with

this

way of thinking, some people believe that the majority of children play football and alike after school hours anyway.

Furthermore

, if every hour spent playing was replaced with learning they would perfect their knowledge and have more opportunities in life. In conclusion, as competitive sports are essential

for

Suggestion

students’ success we should not leave them to their own devices for that matter. There are no two ways about it.

Sat Oct 19 2019

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

253 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.5

Complete response

6.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 checks
Get all the feedback you need to keep improving your charts and letters.
Unlimited Task 2 checks
Practice and perfect your skills with essays.
Personalized suggestions
Know how to boost your score.
Detailed mistakes analysis
Get instant feedback. Spot every mistake.
Topic ideas generator
Get topic-specific ideas to enhance your writing.
Vocabulary helper
Get the right words for any topic.
Progress tracking
Track your writing improvements.

Topic Vocabulary:

life skills
teamwork
discipline
perseverance
physically active
valuable lessons
success and failure
intense pressure
stress and anxiety
self-esteem issues
excessive emphasis
neglect
important subjects
activities

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

8
band
You recently stayed at a hotel for a conference with your company and there were several problems with your room. Write to the hotel management to complain. Include : &Where you stayed. & What the problems were. & How they can fix your complaints.
I hope this message finds you well. I am writing to express my dissatisfaction with my recent stay at the Burj Al Arab Hotel during a conference organized by my company from July 10 to July 12, 2024. Unfortunately, my experience was marred by several issues in my room that I feel need to be addressed.
7
band
Some people think that older employees contribute most to the success of a company. Others think that younger people play a more vital role. Discuss both views and give your own opinion
Some argue that the support that senior employees provide to a company leads to much more success than the one given by people at a younger age. Others think completely the opposite. This essay agrees that although older employees offer an invaluable contribution, people with younger and fresher minds might provide new ideas to revolutionise and contribute to any business.
7
band
Modern technology now allows rapid and uncontrolled access to information in many countries. This is a danger to our societies. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
It is true that today's technology has revolutionized the way of living in a number of countries in the world. Some people believe that this advancement of technology has some detrimental effects on our society, and with which I completely agree.
6
band
At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people. Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?
Currently, statistics show there are a few countries with more adolescent populations than elders. Meanwhile, There are several disadvantages to young populations, but I think the advantages are greater than the disadvantages.
9
band
Some think that politicians should always be honest while others feel that there are times when they must lie. Discuss both sides and give your own opinion.
The question of whether the authority should always be straightforward is a critical concern for citizens, often rooted in a deep-seated desire to safeguard the integrity and strength of the nation. In my opinion, the government should prioritize honesty to the people.

Some people believe that schools should include competitive sports as a subject while others believe that it has negative effects on children. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Fully explain your ideas

You recently stayed at a hotel for a conference with your company and there were several problems with your room. Write to the hotel management to complain. Include : &Where you stayed. & What the problems were. & How they can fix your complaints.

Some people think that older employees contribute most to the success of a company. Others think that younger people play a more vital role. Discuss both views and give your own opinion

Modern technology now allows rapid and uncontrolled access to information in many countries. This is a danger to our societies. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people. Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?

Some think that politicians should always be honest while others feel that there are times when they must lie. Discuss both sides and give your own opinion.