Some people think that young people should choose their professions themselves. Others believe that their parents should choose for them. Discuss both views and give your own opinion

#people #professions #parents

It is widely argued that the younger generation requires to choose their own career pathway, while others believe that the parents should do it for them.

This

essay will discuss both perspective and provide my personal opinion on why the

first

statement is more significant. When addressing the work field, many parents believe that certain professions will bring higher income. In Singapore,

for instance

, 95% of graduates in Nanyang University stated that their parents selected their major degree, despite their own interests towards the subject.

Although

, survey later discovered that 80% of those graduates earn more than SGD$70

Accept space

000 annually and have received an offer prior their graduation, half of them mentioned that they are not happy or satisfied during their work.

Therefore

, parents' selection may bring a better future for their offsprings,

however

, they will eventually realise that the

job

may not be enjoyable.

On the other hand

, in my opinion, children should be able to choose their own profession.

Firstly

, it can significantly increase their mental well-being. In 2015,

researchers

Suggestion

the researchers

found that pupils who follow their passion as an occupation have less depression and more motivation to do their

job

Additionally

, passionate

job

allows them to get

promotion

Suggestion

promoted

quicker than their peers, which

also

equivalent to higher salaries.

This

is because of the fact that they are able to work harder and offer more hours during their working period.

Hence

, offsprings should be able to select their own profession in order to decrease their depression and increase their

job

promotion. In conclusion,

although

many parents think that selecting the career for their children may bring better income, based on the essay above it will

instead

deteriorate their mental health. In my opinion, the younger generation should have the right to choose their own profession, since

this

will allow them to have a better health and career in the future.

Fri Nov 08 2019

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

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‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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12Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

310 words

7.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people think that young people should choose their professions themselves. Others believe that their parents should choose for them. Discuss both views and give your own opinion

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

Universities should accept equal numbers of male and female students in every subject. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some expert believe that it is better for children to begin learning a foreign language at primary school rather than secondary school. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

The media pay too much attention to the lives and relationships of celebrities such as actors, singers or footballer. They should spend more time reporting the lives of ordinary people instead.

Some feel that cities should be designed to be beautiful while others feel their functionality is more important. Discuss both sides and give your own opinion.

Most artists earn low salaries and should therefore receive funding from the government in order for them to continue with their work. To what extent do you agree?