IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7.5

Discuss the reasons why people define happiness differently and how to obtain happiness

#people #happiness
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Most people believe that there is no direct relation between cash and satisfaction. There are various factors other than money that can make people happy. Cheerfulness is a feeling that depends upon the needs of an individual and
this
Linking Words
 makes it difficult to define. Notwithstanding, there are plenty of ways through which people can achieve contentment.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, contentment is difficult to define because it means something different to each individual. Nobody can fully understand or experience another person’s feelings, and we all have our own particular passions from which we take pleasure.
Consequently
Linking Words
, Considering the monetary wealth as an example, people often perceive the value of money differently.
For example
Linking Words
, derive a sense of satisfaction from getting a profit or achieving success, whereas the others take it more lightly, health and family are much more important. According to many, there can be different factors which make people feel happy.
Moreover
Linking Words
, one of the factors that might lead to elation is job satisfaction.
Therefore
Linking Words
, If people are satisfied with the kind of job they are doing, they tend to feel happy. Another factor leading to happiness is a loving family and friends. If the people in an individual’s life are loving and caring, they tend to be happy. As a matter of fact, doing social work can
also
Linking Words
 lead to happiness. Another worth pointing that people feel delighted when they serve the society and contribute towards making it a better place to live in. In conclusion, there are several factors that can contribute towards the exuberance of different individuals. Anyway, specific factors which make individuals happy are those which satisfy their needs at that point of time.
Submitted by thejudgementday999 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: