IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

You have recently moved to a different location where you experience frequent electricity breakdown. Write a letter to the electricity board. In your letter, -describe the situation, -tell what problems you are facing due to this, -explain what you want the board to do

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Dr. Mr Smith Hope you are doing well.I am writing
this
Linking Words
 complaint letter about frequent
electricity
Use synonyms
 breakdown where I am working. It is fact that I have recently moved to your company. I like working in
this
Linking Words
 company.
However
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, since I came here, I have been facing different issues related to
electricity
Use synonyms
 breakdown. Because I only work on the computer . I have to create various projects
due to
Linking Words
 being an architect. First of all, I am coming across inconvenient situations and I am angry about that.I mean, I can not save
in
Correct pronoun usage
it in
show examples
 the memory of the computer in which I create projects.
Then
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, I have to do it once again.
Secondly
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, My notebook is damaged because of an
electricity
Use synonyms
 breakdown.
Therefore
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, I can not deliver projects to building owners on time.
As a result
Linking Words
, they are complaining about
this
Linking Words
 condition. I believe that you will lose problems immediately with
electricity
Use synonyms
. Thank you for considering my complaint. I am looking forward to replying to you soon. Yours faithfully Anne Frank

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General advice
It is essential to use clear and appropriate greetings (e.g., 'Dear Mr. Smith,' instead of 'Dr. Mr Smith') and closings ('Yours sincerely' when the name is known). This would enhance the letter's professionalism and tone.
Task Response
Use vivid and specific examples to describe the problems caused by the electricity breakdown. Details about how it affects work deadlines, the inconvenience it causes in your daily activities, and the impact on equipment would help clarify the situation further.
Coherence and Cohesion
To improve coherence, ensure there is a smooth and logical flow of ideas from one paragraph to the next. Stick to one idea per paragraph, starting with an introduction to the problem, followed by specific examples of the inconveniences, and concluding with a polite request for a resolution.
General advice
Review common phrases and formal language suitable for letter writing. Avoid colloquial expressions and ensure the use of formal language throughout to maintain a suitable writing tone.

The Greeting

Depending on the style and aim of the letter, you will need to adapt your greeting.

Always start an informal letter in the ways:

  • Dear + name
  • Hi / Hello + name

‘Dear...’ is more appropriate, so stick with this.

For a formal letter there are two options for the greeting:

  • Use Dear Sir or Madam if you don’t know the name of the person you are writing to.
  • Use Dear + surname if you do know their name, e.g. Dear Mr Smith or Dear Mrs Jones.

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