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Band 8.5

Many people think that personal happiness is directly related to economic success. Others argue that happiness depends on other factors. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

#people #happiness #success #factors
In general, people consider that industrial achievement is crucial for joy and
also
 largely dependent on economic condition. Some other people believe that there are other factor
also
 contribute in overall personal delight. I believe that capital cannot be the main factor. I shall discuss both points in the essay. People who believe that personal wellbeing have direct connection with wealth have some valid point,
To begin
 with, basic necessities must be met in order to live the dignified life and without dignity, one cannot feel happy. These basic necessities can only be brought through cash.
Furthermore
, the mere fulfilment of basic need can not give long term satisfaction and people like to do more activities
such
 as travel, eat outside, cinema etc. And no doubt that cash is required on
such
 places.
For instance
, As per survey in the Britain half of the people consider a luxury trip as a major source of pleasure and do not hesitate to spend large sums on luxury.
However
, it is found that despite of having cash and comfort in life people are not happy and clearly another factor is involved to become satiate.
Firstly
, personal relationship must be smooth with family member and society as well. It is found in some cases, people do not have cordial relationship with the member and ignored everywhere.
For Instance
, my uncle is the CEO of the company has enough wealth, but still not leading happy time.
Secondly
, health contributes major role in personal gratification. People, who are ill or not fit- in owing to any reasons, can’t be happier irrespective of their financial status. To conclude, salary is definitely playing an important factory in personal glee, but there are other factors like relation, health, respect in society which
also
 cannot be ignored for getting jubilation.
Submitted by atlmavani on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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