Some people believe that success in life depends on hard work and determination, while others believe that other factors like money and personal appearance are important. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

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Nowadays, people get
success
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by their own experience of hard
work
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and
determination
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also
Linking Words
the help of the
money
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and personal appearance. In which people divide these in two factors. Hard
work
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and
other
Suggestion
the other
is
money
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. In
this
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essay I mention both sides of view and
also
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mention my opinion.
Firstly
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, there are too many ways to get the
success
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, while in the view of hard
work
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and
determination
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. People always good in their professional as well as hardworking about their
work
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for their family and personal lives. Like those who have large industry,
their
Suggestion
they're
always hardworking about their
work
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and about their firm.
Secondly
Linking Words
, all the good skills required for any person
for get
dismiss from the mind; stop remembering
forget
the job, is simply doing
hard
Suggestion
the hard work
work
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and all these are
learn
Suggestion
learned
from their school or university.
For example
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, some are very good at marketing skill, so they all are good
determination
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about their task or due date.
On the other hand
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, those people have amounted of
money
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and personal appearance, they can
also
Linking Words
get the
success
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by
invest
Suggestion
investing
the
money
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in some era of
work
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and from that they
also
Linking Words
gave opportunity to others to make a good career.
Next
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is
different area
Suggestion
a different area
of workplace required different amount of
money
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to invest for growth, so in that
case may be
Accept comma addition
case, maybe
case maybe
the hard
work
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is not applicable for
make
Suggestion
making
a large thing. Like someone wants to make
money
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from share market,
then
Linking Words
maybe they required more
money
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and from that they got
success
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. In my opinion, for any person live in
this
Linking Words
earth become a successful in their life than they go for hard
work
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and
determination
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, the reason is that it took some time but definitely they get
success
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.

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • perseverance
  • discipline
  • resilience
  • effort
  • tenacity
  • external factors
  • financial resources
  • favorable appearance
  • perceptions
  • advantages
  • intrinsic
  • extrinsic
  • sustainable
  • facilitating
  • undeniable
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