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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Some people believe that cellphones are harmful to the children while others disagree. Discuss and give your opinion.

#people #cellphones #children
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Mobile phones can be considered as one of the greatest inventions of mankind. According to one pool of thoughts, it has negative effects on kids due to umpteen reasons while others have opposite viewpoint.
This
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 essay shall elaborate both the sides along with my opinion in forthcoming paragraphs. To embark, in
this
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 rat-race competitive world, parents are working and so kids are not monitored.
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Hence they
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Hence, they
 use their phones entire day and get addicted to it. Owing to the overuse,
this
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 addiction has many disadvantages.
Firstly
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, they can easily access adult contents online intentionally or unintentionally.
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 can make them antisocial and they can indulge in wrongful acts. According to a survey, juvenile delinquency can be attributed to the bad influence of adult content available on the internet in modern times.
Secondly
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, these kids get swayed away and play mobile games for hours and hours, which leads to weakening eyesight and distraction from studies. As a result, their grades will be affected.
Moreover
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, some games have violent content and can lead to mental instability. To illustrate, many cases have been reported worldwide, where tender minds suffer from psychological issues due to aggressive and manipulative games. Few cases of suicide were
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 reported.
On the other hand
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, mobiles serve as a great source of knowledge and information if used appropriately. Nowadays, a lot of websites are informative and several apps have been designed so that young minds can imbibe knowledge. To exemplify, Byjus app is built to assist students to better understand their lessons and theories. To conclude, I believe the drawbacks of mobile phones supersede the benefits and are certainly hazardous to the overall development of a child.
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However if
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However, if
 a child is given to use it under surveillance to enhance their knowledge, can be fruitful for him or her.

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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