The graph shows data about annual earnings of three bakeries in London 2000-2010

The graph shows data about annual earnings of three bakeries in London 2000-2010
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The
multi line
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multi-line
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graph
demonstrate
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demonstrates
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information about the yearly earnings
in
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of
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London's three different bakeries between 2000 and 2010.
Overall
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,
Sofia
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and
Cake
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Lab
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had been illustrated significantly increasing during the decade
while
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,
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apply
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Buns had been shown a fluctuation decrease from pick point in these years. Let
is
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us
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glance
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a glance
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to
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at
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Sofia
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's rise which was stability about 5 years, but after 2006 depicted
sharply
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a sharply
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grow from 65.000 to 105.000.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, another baker
Cake
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Lab
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was not as popular as
Sofia
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, despite climbing
and
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apply
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in addition
Linking Words
,
Cake
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Lab
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also
Linking Words
recorded steadiness
approximately
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for approximately
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4 years from 2004 to 2008 by 40.000
Finally
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,
Linking Words
third
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the third
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baker Buns
feced
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faced
fenced
feed
with an oscillation changes and had been dramatically downed to
weak
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a weak
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point which was in 2010 and consisted
35000
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of 35000
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. Buns' trend
also
Linking Words
had been crossed with
Sofia
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in 2006 and
Cake
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Lab
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in 2009.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also".
Introduction: The introduction is missing.
Introduction: Change the first sentence in the introduction.
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
Vocabulary: Replace the words sofia, cake, lab with synonyms.
Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.
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