IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 7.5

Nowadays people are affected by social media and internet. Is it a good or bad trend in your opinion? Explain it by giving your own examples.

#people #media #internet #trend
There is no doubt that these days, people's lives has shrunken into the world wide web.
Therefore
, some people believe that the internet and social media have greatly influenced the folks. In my opinion,
this
 has more negative impact and, I will discuss about it in the essay.
First
 of all, the social media has affected youngsters more than that of adults. The reason is that they devote their maximum time in posting stuffs and updating status on social media.
For example
, Instagram is a social networking platform where the number of followers access an individual's popularity, and to increase their followers, teenagers start showing off their lives on the social networking sites.
Besides
 younger generation, adults are
also
 sweeping over with the charm of web applications, especially WhatsApp. Another important effect is that individuals are living more virtual life these days.
In other words
, they have a lot of online friends, but no real relations due to which they go into depression. To illustrate, a recent study revealed that younger adults aged 18-25 have the highest prevalence of any mental illness compared to the adults aged 26-49 and the reason is the use of social media.
Moreover
, family members are
also
 no longer attached, and despite talking to each other, they remain busy on their mobile phones.
Thus
, relations are destroying, and at the end of the day, everyone feels alone. To conclude,
although
 the internet and social network has brought the closer, I believe that these sources have more disadvantages as these are not only destroying the life of kids but
also
 our relations and taking us away from each other.
Submitted by ashi.rajput39 on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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