- Science will soon make people live up to 100 or even 200 years. Some believe this is good thing while others disagree . discuss both view and your own opinion.

It is generally believed that as the
life
span
is being extended these days,
retirement
age
should be increased simultaneously. I tend to agree with those people as it may lead to the economic flourish.
To begin
with, rules
shoul
Suggestion
the rules
d be changed and updated by the legislature and other authorities equal to
societ
y trans
Suggestion
societal
formation.
Age
of
retirement
is affected by some criteria like
life
span
,
society
needs and economic requirements.
Thus
i
t is lo
Accept comma addition
Thus, it
gical to change
this
age
as these factors are changing.
Moreover
, if workin
g period becam
Suggestion
the working period
e longer, it would be a great aid to econom
y. Peop
Suggestion
the economy
le in the
retirement
period will turn into the pure consumers and their burden should be carried by other
society
sections.
This
phenomenon if happened out of balance, may lead to the economic and
subsequently
society
crisis.
However
, it should not be denied that
age
of
retirement
is not limited to
lif
e
Accept comma addition
to, life
span
, econom
ic and
Suggestion
economics
economy
society
requirements. Of great significance is that other principles like people
abili
Suggestion
peoples'
peoples
ties in high ages,
societ
y accep
Suggestion
society's
tance, mental preparation and etc sh
oul
continuing in the same way
etc.
d be considered. Based on research carried out by scientists, efficiency may alleviate after specific
age
and it is likely to inflict adverse impact on work e
nvironment. By
Suggestion
the work environment
work environments
the way of conclu
sion it appea
Accept comma addition
conclusion, it
rs to me that enhancement of
retirement
age
equal to elevate of
life
span
may lead to the growth of economic due to increase of workforces in societies.

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  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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