More and more wild animals are on the verge of extinction and others are on the endangered list. What are the reasons for this? What can be done to solve this problem?

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It is true that wild animals are on the edge of extermination to a greater extent as well as on the threatened list. There are

variety

Suggestion

a variety

of possible reasons for the extinction of wildlife, but steps can definitely be taken by

government

Use synonyms

to tackle

this

Linking Words

problem. In my opinion, three main factors are associated

Suggestion

with

eradication of nature animals.

Firstly

Linking Words

, Unsustainable growth of

population

Suggestion

the population

need inhabitants for living

purpose

Suggestion

purposes

Consequently

Linking Words

, people cut down enormous areas of rainforest which destroys increasing amount of wildlife habitats.

Secondly

Linking Words

, wild animals often experience different type of

danger

Accept comma addition

danger, such

such

Linking Words

overhunting

excessive heating

overheating

of animals,

overharvesting

Suggestion

, and introduction of invasive species and so on.

Therefore

Linking Words

, it causes wild

animals

Suggestion

animal

animal's

life in danger.

Furthermore

Linking Words

, greenhouse gases make environment polluted

that is

Linking Words

unbearable for some species.

As a result

Linking Words

, animals’ life can be uninhabitable. There are several solutions to those worrying problems and I firmly believe that the change must start with the

government

Use synonyms

. Natural areas and wild animals should be protected by the authorities. A

second

Linking Words

measure would be creating strict laws for those people who are involved with shooting animals for their pleasure as well as the food source.

Although

Linking Words

scientists are researched on some offensive

species but

Accept comma addition

species, but

administration

Suggestion

the administration

should

look upon of

Suggestion

look upon

this

Linking Words

matter so that they can stay out of

this

Linking Words

new producing problem.

Finally

Linking Words

government

Use synonyms

campaigns should promote awareness of planting trees regularly and imposing rules against pollution. In conclusion, the problem of extinction of wild animals will continue to

arise

move upward

rise

However

Linking Words

Accept space

with the right action taken by

government

Use synonyms

the issue can be tackled sensibly and easily.

mahamudzisanSun May 10 2020

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Your opinion

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If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

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...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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13
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
13
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

261 words

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More and more wild animals are on the verge of extinction and others are on the endangered list. What are the reasons for this? What can be done to solve this problem?

Your opinion

Some people think that all university students should study whatever they like. Others believe that they should only be allowed to study subjects that will be useful in the future, such as those related to science and technology. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

As well as making money, businesses also have social responsibilities. Do you agree or disagree?

Some people say that the best way to improve public health is by increasing the number of sports facilities. Others, however, say that this would have little effect on public health and that other measures are required. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.