Nowadays, young people admire sports stars though they often do not set a good example. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

#people #sports #stars #development

It is sometimes argued that in recent years, young generations have a tendency to idolize sports celebrities. While I agree that not all famous

sportspeople

Suggestion

sports people

could become role models, I would argue that the majority could have a positive impact on youngsters. There are several reasons why sports figures could not set a good example for young adults.

This

could be because some famous athletes have negative

behaviors

manner of acting or controlling yourself

behaviours

which cause unacceptable influences on young people.

For instance

, these celebrities who have money to burn show a propensity for splurging their money on luxuries, which make the youth imitate their idols and spend money like water.

Furthermore

, a few sports stars foster over-competitive spirits among young generations due to their win-at-all-costs attitudes

such

as swearing or creating conflicts with their opponents, resulting in uncontrolled aggression in the youth.

However

, despite of the aforementioned adverse causes, I would argue that well-known sportsmen still have a beneficial effect on young people.

First

, young adults could pick up many good qualities from sportsmen who they idolize. Take Cristian Ronaldo, who is one of the most reputable football players in the world,

for example

. In spite of not being appreciated as high natural talent as his colleagues, he still

become

Suggestion

becomes

an outstanding football legend with incredible records thanks to his personal effort and determination in the dedication of training.

This

is a source of motivation and inspiration for youngsters to always strive and make attempts on the track of achievements.

In addition

, with constant training regimes, sports professionals have an

attractive athletic

Accept comma addition

attractive, athletic

body, which kindles young adults’ interest in physical activities.

As a result

, young people who look up to the athletes would take up regular exercises

such

as a specific sport or even an alternative form of exercise, which makes contribution to keep fit and stay healthy in the future. In conclusion,

although

the young could not take all sports stars as their models, I believe that the celebrities influence

actively

Suggestion

acting

Suggestion

the youth.

Submitted by Tran Vy Khanh Vo on Sun Jun 07 2020

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

10Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

330 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

Topic Vocabulary:

admire
role model
excellence
hard work
dedication
cheating
misconduct
critical evaluation
guidance
positive influence
negative influence
inspiration

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

7.5
band
Nowadays university education is considered very important for people's future. However, there are a lot of successful people who didn't get higher education. Do you think that higher education is necessary to succeed in life?
While higher education can provide people with valuable knowledge, skills, and opportunities, it is not the sole determinant of success. Success can be achieved through various paths, and higher education is just one of them. For instance, many entrepreneurs and business leaders, such as Steve Jobs, Mark Zuckerberg, and Richard Branson, achieved remarkable success without obtaining a university degree. These individuals were able to succeed through their innovative ideas, determination, and hard work, rather than relying solely on formal education.
6.5
band
Some people think that importing movies and TV programmes from other countries is better for country . Others think that it is better to produce these locally. Do you agree or disagree?
There has been an ongoing debate on playing foreign TV programmes and movies on local channels. Recently, a surge has been noticed of our media showcasing the entertainment channels of other countries. Some people favour this idea and claim that it makes our countrymen aware of various global cultures. On the contrary, others argue that exposure to foreign traditions through social media may negatively impact our own norms. While both proponents have valid reasons to support their stance, I believe that local entertainment channels should be given priority over imported media.
4.5
band
To what extent do you agree that the men and women should do the same job as each other.
There are lots of debates that the males and the females should do the similar jobs as each other. In my view, I totally disagree with this statement because of several different factors that relative to the physical mentals and social reactions.
4.5
band
As transportation and housing problems increase in many cities, some governments are encouraging businesses to move to rural areas. Do you think the benefits outweigh the disadvantages?
In this contemporary world, industrialisation plays an integral role in the development of the country. There are uncounted advantages and disadvantages of motivating businesses to shift to suburban areas to overcome the challenges of traffic and dwelling issues in metropolitan cities. I think the benefits of this trend outnumber the drawbacks which will be discussed in the upcoming paragraphs.
5
band
Write a letter to a city planning manager about demolition of a historical building in your area and say – Explain why it shouldn’t be demolished. – Suggest a future use for this building. – Recommend a way to raise money for repairs.
The purpose of inscribing this missive is to request you to stop destroying the Palace of King Nawab. This place does not hold only historical importance but also connected with the religious sentiments of people. As, we all are known by his name in histories because he was the last and brave emperor of our city.

Nowadays, young people admire sports stars though they often do not set a good example. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

Include an introduction and conclusion

Nowadays university education is considered very important for people's future. However, there are a lot of successful people who didn't get higher education. Do you think that higher education is necessary to succeed in life?

Some people think that importing movies and TV programmes from other countries is better for country . Others think that it is better to produce these locally. Do you agree or disagree?

To what extent do you agree that the men and women should do the same job as each other.

As transportation and housing problems increase in many cities, some governments are encouraging businesses to move to rural areas. Do you think the benefits outweigh the disadvantages?

Write a letter to a city planning manager about demolition of a historical building in your area and say – Explain why it shouldn’t be demolished. – Suggest a future use for this building. – Recommend a way to raise money for repairs.