Nowadays, young people admire sports stars though they often do not set a good example. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

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It is sometimes argued that in recent years, young generations have a tendency to idolize sports celebrities. While I agree that not all famous

sportspeople

Suggestion

sports people

could become role models, I would argue that the majority could have a positive impact on youngsters. There are several reasons why sports figures could not set a good example for young adults.

This

Linking Words

could be because some famous athletes have negative

behaviors

manner of acting or controlling yourself

behaviours

which cause unacceptable influences on young people.

For instance

Linking Words

, these celebrities who have money to burn show a propensity for splurging their money on luxuries, which make the youth imitate their idols and spend money like water.

Furthermore

Linking Words

, a few sports stars foster over-competitive spirits among young generations due to their win-at-all-costs attitudes

such

Linking Words

as swearing or creating conflicts with their opponents, resulting in uncontrolled aggression in the youth.

However

Linking Words

, despite of the aforementioned adverse causes, I would argue that well-known sportsmen still have a beneficial effect on young people.

First

Linking Words

, young adults could pick up many good qualities from sportsmen who they idolize. Take Cristian Ronaldo, who is one of the most reputable football players in the world,

for example

Linking Words

. In spite of not being appreciated as high natural talent as his colleagues, he still

become

Suggestion

becomes

an outstanding football legend with incredible records thanks to his personal effort and determination in the dedication of training.

This

Linking Words

is a source of motivation and inspiration for youngsters to always strive and make attempts on the track of achievements.

In addition

Linking Words

, with constant training regimes, sports professionals have an

attractive athletic

Accept comma addition

attractive, athletic

body, which kindles young adults’ interest in physical activities.

As a result

Linking Words

, young people who look up to the athletes would take up regular exercises

such

Linking Words

as a specific sport or even an alternative form of exercise, which makes contribution to keep fit and stay healthy in the future. In conclusion,

although

Linking Words

the young could not take all sports stars as their models, I believe that the celebrities influence

actively

Suggestion

acting

Suggestion

the youth.

Submitted by Tran Vy Khanh Vo on Sun Jun 07 2020

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

330 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

admire
role model
excellence
hard work
dedication
cheating
misconduct
critical evaluation
guidance
positive influence
negative influence
inspiration

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Nowadays, young people admire sports stars though they often do not set a good example. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

Include an introduction and conclusion

Some people say that parents have the most important role in child’s development. However, others argue that other things like television or friends have the most significant influence. Discuss both of view and give your opinion.

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Some people believe that robots will play an important in future societies, while others are that robots might have negative effects on society. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

some people say that what individuals do to protect cannot make difference, others say that individuals can protect environment. discuss both views and give your own opinion