Many parents today employ private tutors to teach their children school hours. Do you think that this is a positive or negative development?

#parents #tutors #children #school #hours #development

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As numerous experts in several fields are emerging, today's some parents are in favour of recruiting private professionals to educate and boost their children's knowledge. In my perspective, I deem it beneficial and believe that it can generate positive improvements

such

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as a profound experience and deep education.

However

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, there can be some detrimental outcomes as well, which

this

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essay will highlight. It goes without saying that

this

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trend allows the youth to pursue more education in terms of all spheres

such

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as biology, chemistry or physics. To be precise, children can study even the minuscule details of the certain theme. To exemplify, a 15-year-old child might either know how atom affects the surrounding atmosphere of animals or explore the exact locations of fallen comets.

Hence

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, in the future, those individuals will possess competent aptitudes and have boosted applications.

Similarly

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, any employee is able to employ those candidates and even promote to the highest rank. By stark contrast,

however

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, recruited teachers mean an individual study of a pupil. I suppose it can provoke some mental disorders of a young child.

Firstly

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, as a shock of having no friend in a group

terrifies

Suggestion

Terrifies

the child, he or she might easily get bored or relaxed.

As a result

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, their brains do not receive any new information.

In addition

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, while studying alone, there tend to be strict punishments rather than pragmatic methods of detention like comparing people which current public schools utilize.

Thus

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, those children might be under the stringent pressure, which, admittedly, stems a fear of education.

Consequently

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, they can be fed up with studying alone. In conclusion,

refers to the speaker or writer

once again reaffirm my position that even though an individual study has some advantageous results

such

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as obtaining a professional skill, children might be more likely to develop some psychological sicknesses.

Thus

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, not only should they and their parents take both effects into account, but

also

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they should tend to face their consequences.

Submitted by Asila Mirzalieva on Tue Jun 16 2020

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

320 words

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Many parents today employ private tutors to teach their children school hours. Do you think that this is a positive or negative development?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Some children spend hours everday on their smartphones Why is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

in spite of the advances made in agriculture, many people around the world still go hungry. why is this the case? what can be done about this problem?

Write a letter to your boss apologising for the recent meeting you missed at work Apologise for missing the meeting Explain what happened Say what would you will do to compensate

In the future all cars, buses and trucks will be driverless. The only people travelling inside these vehicles will be passengers. Do you think the advantages of driverless vehicles outweigh the disadvantages?