IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6

Some parents buy their children a large number of toys to play with. What are the advantages and disadvantages for the child of having a large number of toys? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#parents #children #toys #child
It is true that many parents purchase a multitude of playthings for their offspring. Whether or not
this
 is a good thing for the kid, is a moot point. On the face of it the advantages seem most apparent, but could there be a downside to
this
 phenomenon of devoted parenting as well? Most people would consider children who have many toys to be the fortunate ones. Interesting things to play with stimulating many positives in the young boy or girl,
such
 as optimum brain development, hand-eye coordination and colour recognition, apart from the simple joy of playing. Modern toys are designed to be educational as well as fun, and concerned parents carefully select products which might speed their offspring's acquisition of numbers or the alphabet. Is it possible that owning multiple toys could be in any way detrimental to a teenager?
This
 is an unusual question, but there are some hidden pitfalls. For one, wealthy parents might spoil their son or daughter by showering him/her with toys, resulting in a negative effect on the youngster's character. For another, a growing minor's concentration span may suffer if they are constantly surrounded by too many tempting objects
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 so that they become unable to focus on any one game for a decent length of time before being distracted. On the social side, older children may become targets of envy from classmates, if they are perceived as having far more possessions than their peers.
Finally
, the majority of toys today are made of plastic which commonly contains the chemical BPA, proven to be dangerous for infants to suck on or ingest. It is clear
then
 that
this
 situation is not as straightforward as it
first
 appears. It would seem that one of the many duties of parents is to make an informed choice about how many toys they buy for their young ones.
Submitted by runadpub on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
    What to do next:
    Look at other essays: