. As a result of electronic inventions such as the computer and television, people do less physical activity, and this is having a negative effect on their health. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#inventions #computer #television #people #activity #effect #health

These days, the invention of technology

such

as the computer and television has influenced some

people

, especially in their healthy life.

Although

this

can have a detrimental effect on human’s health, I still believe that the advantages of it are far more significant. The main disadvantage of electronic devices is that

people

nowadays tend to have a sedentary lifestyle due to excessive time spent on

such

inventions. Especially for white-collar workers, they are expected to sit down and work almost without breaks in front of the computer’s screen over a long period.

This

repeated action daily can progressively lead to impaired physical mobility, which can make them suffer from cardiovascular diseases and obesity.

Moreover

, many children today are likely to turn into a couch potato due to the development of these technologies. To be more specific, they have glued eyes to the screens to watch television and reduce the time for participating in outdoor activities.

Therefore

, they may suffer from

Add an article

show examples

isual impairment that can cause inconvenience in their daily life. Despite the drawbacks mentioned above, I believe that these inventions are bringing us more merits than demerits.

Firstly

, using these electronic tools enables

people

to remove geographical barriers in communication. To be more specific,

people

now are able to connect with others in many parts of our planet in no time at all.

This

can help them to get the information faster than their predecessors,

thus

reinforcing the relationship among them. Overseas students, as an example, can keep in touch with their long-distance acquaintances.

As a result

,they can maintain the bond with each other, which encourages them to overcome the problem of loneliness and homesickness.

Secondly

people

can be informed about what is happening around the globe, especially those living in remote areas like islands or deserts, simply by turning on a television.

For instance

, if a man chose to live in the isolated countryside, his life would be in huge trouble and tedious as a consequence of the absence of

such

electronic devices. In conclusion, while I support the view that these devices can affect

people

's health, I hold a belief that it has more benefits than downsides.

Submitted by Nina Emily on Tue Jan 26 2021

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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10Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

358 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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. As a result of electronic inventions such as the computer and television, people do less physical activity, and this is having a negative effect on their health. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Include an introduction and conclusion

The best way to obtain/ the key to/ most important factor in job satisfaction is salary. To what extent do you agree or disagree? (Best-way)

Many people in poor countries die from diseases that are curable because they cannot afford the medication required. Do you believe that drug companies should make their products available at reduced prices in these countries?

Many governments think that economic progress is their most important goal. Some people, however, think that other types of progress are equally important for a country. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

First impressions are important. Some people think that doing well in interviews is the key to securing a good job. To what extent do you agree?

In developing countries, children in rural communities have less access to education. Some people believe that the problem can be solved by providing more schools and teachers, while others think that the problem can be solved by providing computers and Internet access.