Some believe that people today have no interest in maintaining the traditional culture of their country or region. Others believe that it is still important to people that we preserve a traditional way of life. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
It is often argued that nowadays individuals have nothing to gain in preserving local or national traditions,
while
others believe that it is still crucial to maintain the tradition. In my opinion, it is essential to strike a balance between embracing the
modernization and safeguarding the traditional Correct article usage
apply
culture
.
Those who believe that people have no interest in maintaining tradition argue that globalization and modernization have led to a shift in priorities. In a fast-paced and interconnected world, individuals are often more focused on pursuing personal and professional success rather than preserving cultural traditions. The allure of Western lifestyles and popular culture
has also
contributed to a decline in interest in traditional practices. For instance
, young people may prefer listening to international music or watching Hollywood movies instead
of engaging with local music or films.
On the other hand
, proponents of preserving traditional culture
argue that it plays a vital role in maintaining a sense of identity and heritage. By preserving traditional arts, crafts, and rituals, future generations can gain a deeper understanding of their roots and cultural heritage. Moreover
, traditional culture
often reflects the values, beliefs, and wisdom of previous generations, which can provide valuable insights and guidance in navigating modern challenges. For example
, traditional festivals and celebrations can bring community
together and reinforce cultural values and unity.
In conclusion, the debate surrounding the preservation of traditional Fix the agreement mistake
communities
culture
is a complex one. While
individuals can not avoid globalization, it is also
crucial to recognize the significance of upholding traditions. Striking a balance between embracing the benefits of modernization and preserving traditional culture
is essential to ensure that future generations have the opportunity to appreciate and learn from their cultural heritage.Submitted by ru.kabiru.biru on
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coherence cohesion
While your essay adheres to a clear structure and includes both an introduction and conclusion, which is commendable, the logical flow between some ideas could be more explicit. Consider using a wider range of cohesive devices to ensure each paragraph transitions smoothly to the next.
task achievement
To improve your score further regarding task achievement, ensure your examples are fully developed and backed up with specific details. While you have addressed the task and presented a clear opinion, more concrete examples and fuller expansion of your points would enhance your response.
coherence cohesion
Your essay exhibits a cohesive structure, with clear topic sentences at the beginning of each paragraph. To enhance the coherence further, work on creating stronger links between these topic sentences and the supporting details they introduce.
Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.
‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.
Examples:
I really want to study but I’m too tired.
I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.
If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.