IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6

Some people think that hosting an international sports event is good for the country, while some people think it is bad. Discuss both views and state your opinion.

#people #sports #event #country
International events are significant for a country as they contribute to the economy of a nation. It has always been a debatable issue whether an international sports event has been hosted by the government or not.
However
, there are two different views about the same.
This
 essay will elaborate
both
Change preposition
on both
show examples
 points with some relevant examples. On the one hand, many people believe that organizing a foreign event has numerous benefits.
First
 and foremost, it will boost the economy of a country.
In other words
, an international event attracts a huge amount of investment through domestic as well as foreign funds.
For example
, in 2019, India held a worldwide football tournament and myriads of MNCs invested an enormous amount for its promotion
as a result
 the economy of India increased tremendously.
Secondly
, it
also
 raised the standard of living of a country. To illustrate, a survey conducted shows that the general public likes to follow the lifestyle of an eminent athlete,
consequently
 the status of people get raised.
Nevertheless
, despite the above merits, there are some drawbacks of the same.
To begin
 with, the government of a nation
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 gives importance to
such
 games and ignore the other significant factors
such
 as education, medical and infrastructure.
For instance
, in the UK, the state, spent a huge amount of public funds on hosting
such
 events.
Therefore
, if the same money was utilized in developing educational institutes and medical centres, it will benefit the whole society.
In addition
, It has a negative impact on juveniles, who without thinking and discussing with elders, strat to follow their famous celebrity. To conclude,
Although
 international events are necessary for the development of a nation, the government should balance the investment cost among all important sectors.
Submitted by latikarohara29 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • economic boost
  • infrastructure
  • national pride
  • cultural showcase
  • inspire a generation
  • temporary boost
  • environmental concerns
  • sustainable planning
  • public funds
  • divert resources
  • tourism influx
  • job opportunities
  • sports development
  • public health
  • construction
  • strategic investment
  • global audience
  • hospitality
  • public services
  • cost-benefit analysis
What to do next:
Look at other essays: