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Band 3

some sports are extremely dangerous but many people still like them very much. why do people take part in dangerous sports? Give some suggestions on how to deal with these dangers.

#sports #people #part #suggestions #dangers
In
present
Add an article
the present
show examples
 scenario, individuals love to play blood
games
for
Add the comma(s)
,for
show examples
 example, Paragliding, Skydiving,Rugby and Bullfighting which is very famous in Spain masses.Public take risk of their life while knowing the results of these sports.There are numerous implications
which
Correct pronoun usage
that
show examples
 can prevent the injuries of performers
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
 the ground and I will explain the
logics
Correct your spelling
logic
show examples
 and suggestions in upcoming
parragraphs
Correct your spelling
paragraphs
, which will be helpful for
players
. To commence with,it is
considerably
Replace the word
considered
show examples
 reasonable that taking part in jeopardy activities is quite adventurous and people who try to get fast astonishing fame and monetary reward through fatal
games
.
Moreover
,these are irrefutable predominant reasons that they participate in
threating
Correct your spelling
treating
 sports to cope up their strength
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 and to live away from nail bitting activities
such
 as daily chores in our lives. In the
second
 place,I have seen numerous
players
 playing rugby like a street game and countless
yougsters
Correct your spelling
youngsters
 got injuries in
this
 mincing game. These all dangerous
games
 should be played with extra cautions and safety rules with the permission of
regime
Correct article usage
the regime
show examples
,so no one shall get harm.The performers who injured other
players
 should be suspended from
team
Add an article
the team
a team
show examples
 or should be banned for upcoming years and
then
 everybody will like to play these horror activities. To put
in
Correct pronoun usage
it in
show examples
 a nutshell,according to me all
games
 are good to play
however
, it is
Correct your spelling
governments
government's
goverenments
Correct article usage
the goverenments
show examples
 responsibility to assert some regulations for the
players
Change to a genitive case
player's
players'
show examples
 protection.
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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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