Some people think money is one of the most essential factors in promoting hapinness. Do you think people can be happy without much money? What other factors contribute towards happiness?

It is true that money plays an indispensable role in every individual's existence, which helps them find
happinness
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happiness

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. In my opinion, people cannot remain in a happy state without money, as life becomes quite challenging without it.
In addition
, having peace and sublime health are the two aspects which makes a
person
live with merriment.
To begin
with, being financially stable is of paramount importance because without it human survival becomes quite burdensome. The reason for
this
is that without proper finances carrying out menial tasks,
such
as doing groceries, buying clothes, paying bills and so on, becomes immensely .
As a result
, a citizen starts relying on relatives and parents for financial aid.
Furthermore
, if being contingent on family and friends continue for longer periods, a
person
may eventually lose their identity and begin to have radical thoughts.
For instance
, it was recently reported in
Times
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the Times

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of India newspaper that a doctor, who was the sole
breadearner
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bread earner
bread-earner

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of his family, attempted suicide after failing to provide monetary support to his wife and children. There are,
however
, two aspects
which
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that

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are considered to be a blessing and
brings
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bring

The singular verb brings does not appear to agree with the plural subject two aspects. Consider changing the verb form for subject-verb agreement.

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immense pleasure
in
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to

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a
person
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personal

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existence. The
first
one is health, if a
person
is healthy, they can easily overcome any obstacles they face during their lifetime.
However
, being sick or handicap may deprive them of leading a normal lifestyle. Another factor is peace, there are many underprivileged
family
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families

The singular countable noun family follows the quantifier many, which requires a plural noun. Consider using a plural noun or a different quantifier.

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who can barely afford
one-time
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a one-time

The noun phrase one-time meal seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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meal, but
are
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is

The plural verb are does not appear to agree with the singular subject many underprivileged family. Consider changing the verb form for subject-verb agreement.

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leading a peaceful life, while there are others though hail from an affluent family
are
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is

The plural verb are does not appear to agree with the singular subject hail. Consider changing the verb form for subject-verb agreement.

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under depression. Taking celebrities as an example, seven out of ten actors and actresses undergo rehabilitation to overcome anxiety and to find
tranquility
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tranquillity

The spelling of tranquility is a non-British variant. For consistency, consider replacing it with the British English spelling.

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. In conclusion, I believe that having money is imperative, for one would not be able to act freely and every trivial
tasks
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task

The singular quantifier every is followed by the plural noun tasks. Consider changing the noun to the singular or using a different quantifier.

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become distressing.
Moreover
, having
a
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apply

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sound health and
peaceful
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a peaceful

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life brings abundance satisfaction to human beings.
Submitted by ieltsspeaking760 on

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