Some students work while studying. This often results in lacking time for education and constantly feeling under pressure. What do you think are the causes of this? What solutions can you suggest?

Youngsters
are considered
as
Change preposition
apply
show examples
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
future of our country. While some think that working part-time helps
teenagers
to learn new
skills
and to become independent. How
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
I believe that working can lead to more burden and to mental stress on younger
people
after their school.
Firstly
, part jobs can have worse consequences for
youngsters
because they already got homework to do at home
on the contrary
if
teenagers
ought to
work
along turning in their assignments given for each subject.
In addition
, it will build more pressure on them and lead to stress.
Furthermore
, it
also
ruins their social life.
Also
,
instead
of spending quality
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
time with friends and family
teenagers
ought to
work
to earn money.
Also
,
This
can completely damage their social life owing to the fact that young
people
don't
Change the verb
aren't
show examples
able to socialize and chat with parents and friends which
also
lead to depression.
Therefore
, students should not
work
after their school.
However
,
youngsters
could develop new
skills
at
work
.
Firstly
, at
work
Correct your spelling
workplace
show examples
place
Add a comma
,place
show examples
teenagers
can
built
Change the verb form
build
be built
show examples
more confidence and could learn good communication
skills
. As, when young
people
interact with other
people
they gain experience and even learn
new
Add an article
a new
show examples
language. After
this
,
teenagers
gain decision-making
skills
, and they started
taking
Correct your spelling
making
show examples
more decisions independently in their live.
Therefore
, students should
work
after their school. In the conclusion, everything has
their
Correct pronoun usage
its
show examples
own pros and cons.
Therefore
, to gain more experience and
skills
youngsters
ought to give up on their social life.
Submitted by yasdeep333 on

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Structure your answers in logical paragraphs

The easiest way to score well on the IELTS Task 2 writing portion is to structure your writing in a solid essay format.

A strong argument essay structure can be split up into 4 paragraphs, each containing 4 sentences (except the conclusion paragraph, which only contains 3 sentences).

Stick to this essay structure:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Financial necessity
  • Tuition
  • Living costs
  • Employability
  • Work experience
  • Under pressure
  • Mismanagement
  • Time-management
  • Academic pursuits
  • Flexible part-time study
  • Financial aid
  • Scholarships
  • Bursaries
  • Collaboration
  • Integrated programs
  • Education
  • Work-life balance
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